The Issue In Taking Both Sides

The Issue In Taking Both Sides

And why I am partly to blame.

There is so much for me to say. There is so much I could say and should say and probably say, but at this point, what can I say sincerely? What can I say that will not sound like preaching to the choir? How do I make it clear what I believe in without upsetting anyone or look like I crave attention and validation for my stance?

I've learned something that may not answer these questions but guide me as I develop my writing. In the wake of recent events of Charlottesville and Donald Trump's response, being a moderate just is not an option, and that scares me.

After the election, I put out a piece asking what the country's next step should be, and like a mother, I gave some advice before her sons and daughters embarked on a journey into the latest presidential era. In that article, I told readers "It's justifiable to fight and protest against hateful and discriminatory rhetoric, but don't embody it." I did not take into account that the Ku Klux Klan or Neo-Nazis would be taking to the streets in overwhelming numbers (although even if it was just one white supremacist on the street I would still find that one too many). I did not expect our president to say “there is blame on both sides,” addressing not only the white nationalists marchers but its protesters as well.

How do I tell someone how to petition and assembly when one side is protesting against a group that has the most infamously discriminatory rhetoric of all? How do I tell someone there is aggression on both sides when one side is combatting the group that generations of Americans were taught in school to be the most immoral, the most evil people that ever lived? That is when I realized, being moderate will not solve the problem. It makes me a bystander that contributes to the problem.

Similarly, the country cannot afford to act moderate, let alone our president. In times of crisis, presidents are looked upon to be the leader, to sit in the captain's chair and guide its crew through rocky waters and violent whitecaps (or in this case white supremacists). Presidential crisis rhetoric calls for a reinstatement of communal values, rationalization, and a call to action. In a New York Times opinion piece, author Jeremy W. Peters talks to Noah Rothman, an editor for a conservative journal who states "We need to have a conversation about where we are as a country,” referring to how Republicans and Democrats create their own narratives on violence and terrorism in the United States. So to say there is blame on both sides tells me that Donald Trump believes white supremacy is a part of American values, something that I believed we were looking to diminish. To say there was aggression on both sides rationalizes nothing but the Charlottesville rally that only furthers the schism between liberals and conservatives. To blame both sides provides no call to action on how to address any of this violence.

Donald Trump's presidency has given me a lot to take in, and there are times when I feel as though I should say something and other times where it is best to keep my mouth shut. I do not want to feel like I am preaching to a choir that will pat me on the back or bashing somebody else's opinion or lecturing scholars who know and understand the situation with more depth and analysis than myself, but all of that is inevitable when you put your voice out there. I also cannot stay silent with news of this threatening magnitude.

If anything, this piece is more of a reflection of the past week than anything, trying to organize my thoughts and express my feelings. I can only hope this will help me be a little more proactive than our president.

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I'm The Girl Who'd Rather Raise A Family Than A Feminist Protest Sign

You raise your protest picket signs and I’ll raise my white picket fence.

Social Media feeds are constantly filled with quotes on women's rights, protests with mobs of women, and an array of cleverly worded picket signs.

Good for them, standing up for their beliefs and opinions. Will I be joining my tight-knit family of the same gender?

Nope, no thank you.

Don't get me wrong, I am not going to be oblivious to my history and the advancements that women have fought to achieve. I am aware that the strides made by many women before me have provided us with voting rights, a voice, equality, and equal pay in the workforce.

SEE ALSO: To The Girl Who Would Rather Raise A Family Than A Feminist Protest Sign

For that, I am deeply thankful. But at this day in age, I know more female managers in the workforce than male. I know more women in business than men. I know more female students in STEM programs than male students. So what’s with all the hype? We are girl bosses, we can run the world, we don’t need to fight the system anymore.

Please stop.

Because it is insulting to the rest of us girls who are okay with being homemakers, wives, or stay-at-home moms. It's dividing our sisterhood, and it needs to stop.

All these protests and strong statements make us feel like now we HAVE to obtain a power position in our career. It's our rightful duty to our sisters. And if we do not, we are a disappointment to the gender and it makes us look weak.

Weak to the point where I feel ashamed to say to a friend “I want to be a stay at home mom someday.” Then have them look at me like I must have been brain-washed by a man because that can be the only explanation. I'm tired of feeling belittled for being a traditionalist.


Because why should I feel bad for wanting to create a comfortable home for my future family, cooking for my husband, being a soccer mom, keeping my house tidy? Because honestly, I cannot wait.

I will have no problem taking my future husband’s last name, and following his lead.

The Bible appoints men to be the head of a family, and for wives to submit to their husbands. (This can be interpreted in so many ways, so don't get your panties in a bunch at the word “submit”). God specifically made women to be gentle and caring, and we should not be afraid to embrace that. God created men to be leaders with the strength to carry the weight of a family.

However, in no way does this mean that the roles cannot be flipped. If you want to take on the responsibility, by all means, you go girl. But for me personally? I'm sensitive, I cry during horror movies, I'm afraid of basements and dark rooms. I, in no way, am strong enough to take on the tasks that men have been appointed to. And I'm okay with that.

So please, let me look forward to baking cookies for bake sales and driving a mom car.

And I'll support you in your endeavors and climb to the top of the corporate ladder. It doesn't matter what side you are on as long as we support each other, because we all need some girl power.

Cover Image Credit: Unsplash

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To Those Of You That Made Fun Of Trump For Giving The Clemson Tigers Fast Food, Shame On You

There are people who enjoy the simpler things in life and don't need anything larger than life in order to be satisfied.


Imagine being an athlete that worked very hard all season long and defeated a top contender that's known for being undefeated. Hooray! You won against that undefeated team and you, your teammates, and your family get to go to the White House and have a celebratory dinner. The twist is that the dinner you're going to be served is composed of fast food from various chains.

That's what happened on January 14th, 2019, when the Clemson Tigers visited the White House after their 44-16 win against the Alabama Crimson Tide. The players were met with a buffet of fast food from Wendy's, McDonald's, pizza, and much more. This buffet came out of Trump's own pocket due to the partial government shutdown and with him being fast food lover himself.

"I think we are going to serve McDonald's, Wendy's and Burger King with some pizza. I really mean it," he said. "It will be interesting. I would think that's their favorite food. So we'll see what happens."

According to a pool report written by Josh Dawsey, the players "whooped as they saw the food spread" with Trump saying that this was "great American food."

The reaction to this fast food dinner had, of course, received backlash. People called the celebratory meal "classless" and also said that the players "deserved better." Really? The Clemson players have to meet with "culinary coaches" in order for them to eat healthy matter. In addition to that, they also had their diets monitored, giving them individual cooking demos, selecting the right type of "fuel."

Imagine going through all of that dietary restriction for months and getting to finally eat food that you have been dying for, it would be a dream come true, especially to lineman Matt Bockhorst! To the naysayers who shamed President Trump for serving fast food to players, let's take a look back in history.

It's the turn of the decade, 1939 to be exact. King Goerge VI visited then President, Franklin Delano Roosevelt, on American soil. The four-day visit consisted of a sight-seeing tour of Washington, a formal State Dinner and a big bash at the British Embassy. The visit also had a casual yet memorable moment in history: the British Monarch ate his first hot dog.

Along with Queen Elizabeth (the mother), the casual picnic was held at Roosevelt's Hyde Park's cottage on June 11, 1939. The menu also consisted of Virginia ham, smoked turkey, cranberry jelly, green salad, rolls, strawberry shortcake, coffee, beer, and soft drinks. The headline from the New York Times read "KING TRIES HOT DOG AND ASKS FOR MORE" the following day and according to reporter Felix Belair Jr., the British monarch enjoyed his share of two hot dogs with beer. The royal guests even ate off of paper plates like everyone else in attendance.

What President Trump did on that fateful evening was anything but different than what President Roosevelt did. They both displayed an aspect of American living that was relatable to the working class. An average American will often treat themselves to some fast food if they've had a busy day at work and don't feel like cooking.

To the people who turned your noses at this story, shame on you. There are people who enjoy the simpler things in life and don't need anything larger than life in order to be satisfied. If I were in that room that night, I would be very thankful because who can turn down free food, especially if it's food that you crave from time to time?

In my honest opinion, President Trump delivered when it came to feeding those football players. Not only will Clemson bring home the title of being National Champions, but also bellies filled with Big Macs, french fries, pizza, and all the food their hearts desired!

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