“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."

Let me tell you about the girl I love, the girl who taught me to love. Her name is Alexandria Light, she is my girlfriend, my best friend, and the love of my life. When I met her I was just an awkward Freshman in High School, you know, that weird phase where you still haven’t dropped your baby fat but have already started puberty so you have a pizza face and look like the Pillsbury dough boy… Essentially, I was not pretty looking, at least, not yet. *winks seductively* But anyways, I was weird and she was the most beautiful girl I had ever met (still is). Needless to say, I had a huge crush on her since the second I saw her, and she took some warming up, I did a little bit of maturing and emotional growth and eventually, thank God, she developed a liking to me. We have been through a lot together and, if it weren’t for her, I wouldn’t be the person I am today.

Humans, I believe, are naturally selfish and egocentric beings. Everything we do and all we strive to do is to achieve our own personal goals, aspirations, and ambitions. And, it is completely logical and valid! All you can be sure of and ever will perceive is that you are the center of the universe, you can’t be sure of anything else, and, you can’t even be sure of that; even your own consciousness can be questioned. However, love makes us do very illogical and, quite literally, insane things. The definition of insanity is to do something over and over again and expect different results, is that not how we pursue love? The only difference between true insanity and true love is that, eventually, you get a different result, even if it takes a thousand tries. I had a crush on Alexandria for YEARS, I went through a lot of hurt and longing to be with her. I was literally crazy for her: I liked her and was her best friend and always supported her, even if she never reciprocated the feelings I had for her.

I was there for her over and over again and always hoped the next time would be the time she would finally care for me back the way I cared for her. And, I know why I didn’t succeed for a long time, I always expected and/or hoped she would like me back. I only did these things for her because I was selfish, in hopes I would get something in return.

Eventually, I realized this and I pulled back a little bit and I started not to expect anything in return. I started to do things not for myself, but to really be a friend to her and do things because I wanted to see her happy, because seeing her happy was more important than getting her to like me. I became, for the first time in my life, a truly selfless person. I learned compassion, humility, and kindness, something that never came easily to me, but always seemed effortless in her. I no longer strived to be someone else or break my back to get her to notice me; I simply became a better person by being a true friend to her. It was at this point that she really started to notice me, she noticed I wasn’t whipped and constantly trying to impress her to make myself feel better, she realized I had pure intentions and that I truly cared for her. I know it sounds weird, but, I thank her for letting me like her and never have her like me in return for two years straight!

I wasn’t ready to love her and it never would have worked out because what I had was a selfish infatuation, but, she taught me real love. Real, selfless, and complicated love. She waited for me to mature and, because of that, the timing was perfect. Don’t get me wrong, we weren’t all of a sudden the perfect couple with no problems, we have had a lot bumps in the road, but we truly have been blessed with perfect timing because we have never failed to find our way back to each other. And, I can only ever thank her for waiting until I was ready.

True love is not self-seeking, which would mean it isn’t really natural either, but it is so fulfilling. Not everyone will get to experience the love I feel, and that makes me sad, but, some are simply just not capable of love. It might sound harsh, but, maybe that is why divorce rates are so high, I think people might have a honeymoon phase and feel some euphoric sense of passion, but it doesn’t last because those people haven’t learned to truly be selfless. The most selfless and genuinely caring people I know always happen to be the ones most capable of love, and I really think there is a direct correlation. I couldn’t be happier that I fell in love with Alexandria, because, I’m not 100% sure I would have learned to be selfless and truly be capable of love without her. And, that is why I really do consider her my soulmate, maybe because of fate or some divine intervention, I’m not exactly sure, but what I can be sure of is that she is the only girl in the world who makes me want to be the best possible version of myself. I know it sounds cliché, but, please, wait for the right person, they are worth every second of waiting. You might find them at 14 or 40, I don’t know, but I guarantee you that they’re worth the wait. Wait for the person who makes you excited to wake up every morning and take on the day, the person who you support and who supports you wholeheartedly, the person who is not only your partner, but your best friend.

I can truly say that, one day, I will marry Alexandria Light. And some might try to discourage me or be in disbelief and say: “oh, well… you’re 20 years old, you’re just a kid.” I promise you, Alexandria and I aren’t some dumb, infatuated, hormonal younglings with unrealistic expectations. We do not romanticize love or blow it out of proportion to be this perfect, crystalline structure where everything falls into place. We have faced a lot of hardships in our past and I know we will have plenty more unknown struggles in the future, but, she’s really the only one who is worth fighting for. Alexandria is my best friend, my girlfriend, the love of my life, my soulmate, my high school sweetheart etc. and I can’t imagine a life with anyone else but her by my side. No matter what happens or what obstacles we may face, I will never let her slip away, I will only ever hold on tighter. This is my promise; this is my love. Now, go find yours.