When I was young, I always envisioned myself having this perfect future. I dreamed of the success, handsome husband and, of course, being the happiest I could be. As I grew older, I started to see the harsh reality that this “perfect picture” most likely wouldn’t happen, at least the way I was envisioning it.

By the end of my first year of college, my anxiety was at an all time high, and I had obtained the fear of oblivion. I became upset with not being able to clearly see what was next for me. I couldn’t even stand a Christmas gift being a surprise... it was awful.

2017 was the year that gave me a new perspective. This year a series of events showed me that it’s OK to not know every little thing that is in store for me and that sometimes, the things we don’t see coming for us are the best things to come.

"Knowing too much of the future is never a good thing." - Rick Riordan, "The Lightning Thief"

To the one who fears the future,

I realize exactly how you feel. You have to "be in the loop" and know exactly what is going on, along with the outcomes, or else your anxiety will be at an all-time high. Constantly having to find peace with the things you do before you proceed with them. The lists, weighing out the good and the bad things that come with your actions. How this one decision that you make could affect your entire future makes you sick.

Trust me, not only does this escalate, but one thing that you realize is that no matter what you do, your future never has an exact answer. Finding out that sometimes what comes next is this huge question mark will drive you to the point of insanity.

After many years of this repetitive cycle, I was burnt out. Becoming disgusted with always having to cry yourself to sleep at night due to the anxiousness and the depression that was repercussions of this great fear. No longer being able to handle the stress that came with the thoughts that ate you up inside, the mystery, the unknown of what was known as your fate.

One thing to always remember is that life will bring you many great things. Sometimes, after a turn of events, you learn that we, as people, aren’t meant to know some of the things that will come into, or even leave, our lives. I know it seems scary, but good things come to those who wait, and that patience is a virtue.

I’ve seen, after these past few months that some things in life are best left uncertain. I obtained the perspective of seeing the beauty and pure happiness from things that I never knew existed. With these new opportunities, I realized I had no pro and con list or even the time to question or doubt.

This was the most glorious thing I had ever experienced. I learned there is a way to conquer this, a way to win the battle of not knowing.

I know this sounds redundant, but take time to see life in the present, live in the moment. Everything in our lives happens for a reason, and though it may take time, it will always work out for the best.