Pulling an all-nighter or two or three or 20 is pretty much inevitable in college. When things stack up and you must write an eight-page English essay on an object of importance in Shakespeare, it is at times like these that you regret all of your life decisions that culminated to the point of you questioning whether you would be better off buying a one way trip to Madagascar instead of facing a night of pure insanity. Here are the 15 stages of pulling an all-nighter:
8:00 p.m.
You have found your perfect study spot at the library and you are ready to set up camp. Large iced coffee in hand and phone put on "do not disturb," you are ready to be done by midnight -- at least, that's what you tell yourself in order to not run out of the library screaming.
9:00 p.m.
This essay is a lot harder than you thought. The perfect thesis you wrote the day before is not supporting your commentary. Why is this happening? You sip your coffee nervously.
10:00 p.m.
The thesis has been figured out and now you are one and a half pages in. You are on a writing roll, but wait, you feel like you deserve a break, so you Snapchat and text until your phone battery becomes disturbingly low.
10:30 p.m.
Most people have left the library. You are still here. Crickets are chirping and you are not typing fast enough to be done by midnight.
11:00 p.m.
You get up and walk around - taking mini field trips of procrastination. You realize you need more caffeine so you buy a small chai latte.
Midnight
Yas. Just Yas.
12:45 a.m.
You are overcaffeinated, overstressed, and over your original time goal. The library speaker system is giving its 15-minute closing warning.
1:00 a.m.
The library is essentially closed so you trudge back to your dorm with your fellow late-nighters. The common room may be the change of space you need to finish the essay.
2:00 a.m.
So close to being 75 percent of the way done. The pressure is on. You start blasting Kanye through your headphones just to wake your brain up.
3:00 a.m.
So sleepy. Why are people still up ordering pizza when they are already done with their work? You are so jealous that they can go to bed whenever they choose to.
5:00 a.m.
The essay is done. Your stress level exploded hours ago. And, you still need to make a bibliography.
7:00 a.m.
Time to print your beautiful essay. You email it to yourself just to make sure your computer doesn't shut down so you don't lose all of your work. And, you still have to change clothes and shower so you don't look like you belong in "The Walking Dead" for your 8 a.m.
8:00 a.m.
You are barely functioning, but at least, you got your essay in on time and it is (hopefully) one of the best essays you have ever written. Your bed is calling your name.
