I don't want you.

I don't miss you.

You are nothing to me

anymore.

I am free.

What we once were

what we could have been

do not cross my mind.

I am happy

without you.

I hope you are happy

without me.

I don't cry

I don't smile

At the thought of you.

I am free

of the negativity

of the mind games.

Because you did not hurt me

I hurt myself.

I let you

destroy me.

I don't blame you

anymore.

I blame myself.

I blamed myself.

I let myself become a paradigm

one that I had always looked down on

since middle school

when girls would let themselves

get attached

to selfish boys

that meant nothing

will never mean anything.

They went back to their

"boyfriends"

when they were

mean

cruel

undeserving of forgiveness.

I was one of those

girls

at the age of 19

drained

exhausted

heartbroken

a tear-stained wreck

of a human.

Victim of a brutal attack

where the attacker was not even truly aware

of the damage they had caused.

Well

they were aware

but they didn't mean it.

That's what I told myself

anyway.

You were

mean

cruel

undeserving of forgiveness.

I let you win

over

and over

and over again.

That is over now.

I am myself

again.

Biting

sarcastic

ridiculous

self confident

learning

to be kind

again.

I am no longer

a ghost.

That is over now.