Thanksgiving has become an antithesis to what I believe
Start writing a post
Relationships

Holidays Like Thanksgiving Make Me Feel Empty

I do not feel thankful today.

14
Holidays Like Thanksgiving Make Me Feel Empty
https://pixabay.com/en/smoking-lighter-dark-cigarette-918884/

Thanksgiving is here again. To most people, that means time with friends and family. Or if not that, then a feast of food or drunken confusion. It is a day that I was trained to stay far away from the roads because of the sheer number of drunk drivers I would encounter.

Thanksgiving has been drilled into the skulls of almost everyone in the United States. There are those who hate it because it represents a massive genocide that has not been properly rectified. There are others who despise it because the day after, Black Friday has slowly encroached upon it. Funny how a day of excess has rolled into a separate but equal day about excess.

However, Thanksgiving also means going back to the past. Many people see positives in going home and spending time with friends and family. Not me. Many people reflect fondly on what they have or the deeds they have accomplished. They return to where they once lived and smile. Not me.

Indeed, when I look back at my past, I see nothing but pain. The life I once had was so frightening that I ran halfway across the world just to escape it. The life I once had is a massive weight that continues to try and drag me down. There is nothing to be thankful for from it. In fact, my very past has tainted this phrase to me.

I refuse to feel thankful for what I have. I learned the hard way that complacency will destroy me at every turn. Realizing that refusing the thankful was a much better alternative; than having my life drag me down. Thanksgiving became a representation of everything I seek to run away from.

If today I became a millionaire, I would want the world. If today I got the world, I would want the solar system. If today I got the solar system, I would want the galaxy. Thus by refusing to be thankful, I can push ahead. It is past time to be held back by looking at what I have. In reality, there is nothing there.

My life has taught me that anything I accomplish can be snuffed away instantly. Any of my proudest moments can be shattered in less time than it takes for me to ask what happened? The darkness in my heart is all that is left of a horrific past that I live every day trying to move past. And I refuse to celebrate Thanksgiving. For if I do then I have to acknowledge, that I have nothing. Then I have to come to terms with the fact that I am truly nothing. That one day I will die and vanish from the world and have left nothing to remember.

That all will come to pass the moment I become thankful. Thus I refuse. I refuse to be thankful for anything. So long as there is a single thing in the multiverse that I do not have, I will do whatever it takes to claim it as my own. No time to waste on the past. I have a future of conquest ahead of me.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Featured

4 Common Reasons Couples Get Divorced

Are some people just not meant to be together? Is there any way to prevent an impending divorce?

24351
4 Common Reasons Couples Get Divorced

We've all heard the statistics. Roughly 50% of married couples eventually end up divorced. This can lead to complications, problems with your children, financial issues, and no small amount of negative emotions.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

​Pets are Good for the Soul

Millions of Americans have found comfort in pet ownership. The media has been awash with stories about a surge in pet ownership, as Americans have taken advantage of the ability of pets to improve emotional well-being.

38978
Good for the Soul
Pets are Good for the Soul

America is going through a mental health crisis. This crisis predates the global pandemic, but has in many ways been dramatically exacerbated by it. In 2019, 19.86% of adults, or 50 million Americans, reported suffering from a mental illness. The emotional toll of the pandemic has been heavy, with over half of U.S. adults saying that they have experienced stress and worry related to Covid-19. Anxieties over work, uncertainty about the future and other triggers have intensified the mental health crisis. Millions of Americans have found comfort in pet ownership. The media has been awash with stories about a surge in pet ownership, as Americans have taken advantage of the ability of pets to improve emotional well-being.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

How Your Sleep Position Affects Your Health?

You changed into your pajamas, turn off the lights, and get yourself ready to sleep. How do you prefer to sleep, on the back, on your side, or on your tummy? Although there’s no scientific result that sleeping position affects your back, here are some interesting facts that have been discovered.

157991
Sleep Position

You changed into your pajamas, turn off the lights, and get yourself ready to sleep. How do you prefer to sleep, on the back, on your side, or on your tummy? Although there’s no scientific result that sleeping position affects your back, here are some interesting facts that have been discovered.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

How to Throw the Ultimate Winter Bash

As the year starts to come to an end, make sure you find the time to have some fun as well.

112094
Ultimate Winter Bash

As the year starts to come to an end, make sure you find the time to have some fun as well.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Prose: When The Gavel Falls (Story Excerpt)

Johnathan Yarrow is a successful defense attorney, until he takes on a personal case he cannot win. Ruined by the loss and haunted by his past, Yarrow, a man who desired to see the good in all people, starts to learn that not everyone can be good... not even himself.

106380
Prose: When The Gavel Falls (Story Excerpt)
https://unsplash.com/s/photos/lawyer

I woke up, like any other night, in a bed full of nightmares, drenched in sweat that stuck coldly to my skin, as a reminder of the dreams I couldn’t escape. The dream was so vivid, I felt it physically burn on my cheek. I wondered if the sting from the slap was worse simply because her eyes held no remorse, not an ounce of respect.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments