Dear friend,

I’m not sure I can ever say thank-you for being there for me when I couldn’t be there for myself. See, these past few months have been a mess of things and I’m not sure I would have lasted without you by my side to guide me. I know that it seems like I don’t care, I don’t listen, I don’t appreciate the things you do, but the truth is none of that is true. I just don’t always show my appreciation to you.

It’s hard for me to realize that there are people who know me better than I know myself. There are people who have my best interest in mind. People who have no problem going above and beyond to ensure that I’m alright. So why do I find it so hard to share this with you? Easy, I’m afraid if I show my “soft” side that you’ll walk away. That you’ll assume I don’t need you anymore and you’ll leave. Everyone always leaves. So rather than risking that, I challenge you. I challenge you in every single way possible. Instead of running, you taught me so much that I didn’t even know.

Before you came along, I was terrible at talking about things. Okay, so maybe I’m still pretty bad at it. I know, I know I’m working on it. But you see, you would always make me talk. Sometimes it was more obvious than others. There were days when you’d make me think it was my idea to talk. But no matter how it came about, you were there for me. You listened to me. You tried to give me advice. At the end of the day, you gave me someone who would always listen to me.

I didn’t realize how much you’d actually learned about me. I just assumed you’d listen to those little problems I ranted about and forget them. That you didn’t actually have my interest in mind when we spoke. That I was annoying you with my problems. But recently it was made perfectly clear that is not the case at all.

When things got the toughest, you were there to show me the side of you I hadn’t seen. The side of you that knows me better than I know myself. You were there when I needed you most, to attempt to give that one of a kind advice once again. But it was more than the fact you were giving me advice, that was something I’d grown used to. It was the fact that you were showing me the things you’d learned about me in the advice you gave. You showed that you know I’m afraid of commitment. That I would rather push people away than let them in. That running from things seems less scary to me.

Again, you didn’t run. You didn’t get angry. You just showed me you were there and that we’d get through this together.

You gave me tough love whenever I needed it. Told me I was being ridiculous. Talked me out of making drastic decisions at work and never let my emotions take over too much. When I was having a bad day, you’d be there to try and make it better. It didn’t always work, but you still tried.

I know I’m terrible at showing my appreciation and that usually I tell you you’re a jerk as I shake my head at you. Or that sometimes I’m irritable and I get mad at you or yell at you. That sometimes I get mad at you for what seems like the littlest things and completely avoid you for weeks. But you still want to be there for me and for that I’m grateful.

Thank you for not giving up on me when I was too stubborn. Never letting me push you away no matter how much I tried. For being concerned about me and the choices I make. I know that I’ve put you through a lot and it’s amazing it didn’t scare you away. But I think the favorite lesson that it doesn’t matter how you meet a person, there’s nothing stopping you from caring about them. Thanks for making all the bad days at work better. For trying to calm me down when I let things get to me. For being that one person I can lean on no matter what. For pushing me to do my best and be my best me. Lastly, thank you for just being you when I need it most. Nothing makes all the hard days better than knowing I have that one good friend looking out for me and to make me laugh when I just want to cry. I’ve been given one of the best friends in the world.

Love,

Your Stubborn, Emotional But Always Grateful Friend.