Let me begin by saying this, I am not a friend of Farrah Abraham. I have never met her and probably never will. The following is simply my own opinions and observations of her as seen through social media, MTV, and tabloids. However, the reason I chose to write about Miss Abraham is because her behavior intrigues me as an individual.
I began watching Teen Mom when I was a junior in high school in 2011. In 2009 the show first aired on MTV as 16 and Pregnant. I think that when the show aired, as with any new show, the creators and the network probably had taken bets on whether or not the show would even gain popularity and last for more than one season. As it is though, the show did gain quite a bit of popularity and is now is on its 8th season on MTV. That being said, I'm almost positive that the creators had no idea at the time just how complex the four young ladies chosen for the show would prove to be in time. Over the last seven years, the world has watched as these four incredible individuals, who are no different than the rest of us, I might add, grew up on the screen in front of us and tried to figure out how to play the game of life with being teen moms in sometimes unpleasant circumstances. I personally feel like I have grown up with Caitlyn, Amber, Maci, and Farrah as each of us are in our twenties now and much different than we were at 16.
While I still enjoy watching the show to keep up with how these, now young women, are doing in their lives, there is one young woman that I particularly enjoy following. Farrah Abraham has proved to be perhaps the most controversial individual as we have all seen her numerous spats with her parents and co-stars on screen. The tabloids and social media are always quick to air her dirty laundry as well, giving everyone who pays attention, the impression that Farrah is just another filthy rich, spoiled brat of a person that we so often see in Hollywood. To be honest, up until recently that is exactly how I felt about her as well.
I watched Farrah as she continually fought with her parents on screen. I used to think her poor parents created a monster by spoiling her all her life because her behavior towards them was deplorable. However, as I have been trying desperately to keep up with the new season, I have made a few new assumptions about this young woman that I think most would either be uninterested in considering or simply just haven't thought of before.
While it may seem that Farrah's family seems to be well off and have tried to give her the very best life possible, and I have no doubt that they have, I think what's lacking is genuine attention and love. It seems to me that from watching the show over the years and observing the behavior between Farrah and her mother, Deborah, Farrah is incredibly angry with her parents. One could argue that angry or not, Farrah has no right to treat her parents the way that she does because they have given her everything. But I would argue and say that while I agree, sometimes giving a child everything is not always the best policy when all they really need is love and attention. I don't think Farrah got enough of that as a kid. It seems to me that her parents spent so much time trying to buy her things and take her places that they forgot to show her attention. I think she realizes this now, as she has gotten older and she's angry about it; as well she should be.
I further think that in her relationship with her mother, her mother seems to be a bit of a drama queen, if you will. If it isn't about Deborah running the show, per say, then it doesn't matter. I think she is a controlling person, from what I have gathered, and I think that now she feels she needs to try and control her daughter, Farrah, but now Farrah is an adult and doesn't need to be controlled. I think that's where a lot of their issues arise.
Not only do I think that Farrah had a not so good childhood in the fact that I feel she was not paid attention to, or at least not the kind of attention that she needed, I think she went looking for attention elsewhere. This attention just so happened to be from her ex-boyfriend and Sophia's father who passed away, Derek. As anyone who is familiar with the show will tell you, Daddy Derek, as Farrah refers to him, is a common name that you hear throughout many of the episodes. Derek and Farrah had a serious relationship for some time when Farrah was in high school but her parents did not approve at all. Of course since her parents did not approve that only pushed Farrah closer to Derek in the long run, as so often happens with teenagers and their relationships. The relationship Farrah's parents and Derek had with each other only worsened therefore driving a wedge between Derek and Farrah and her parents.
As Farrah mentioned on the show a few times, her parents and Derek got into a major fight the night Derek was killed in a car accident. This is while Farrah was pregnant with Sophia, Derek's child. I think that a lot of her anger and aggression stems from the the fact that she blames her parents for her failed relationship with Derek. If this is the case, then I understand why. She finally found someone to pay her attention, someone that loved her, and then her parents were not happy about it. Maybe he was a bad influence. Maybe he was a bad guy. Whatever the case, Farrah was head over heels in love with him and in my opinion still is. But because her parents didn't approve and because Derek passed away so suddenly, she will never know now what could have been. This is a thought that I think troubles her quite a bit, from what I have gathered. It would trouble anyone. I think she needs someone to blame for that and her parents are the ones she blames.
I think that given this traumatic loss that she experienced at such a young age, and given the circumstances that surrounded it, this has made Farrah put up a shield in front of herself so that she can't be hurt anymore. Rightfully so. That is a lot for a 16 year old girl to deal with. Then you add in the fact that she really couldn't even grieve because her parents never liked the person she was grieving about. Anybody would act the way she does. I think her fits that we see on her parents, on her co-stars and on her boyfriends, most of all Simon, is her taking out her anger and sadness the best way she knows how without having to actually talk about it. Because her motto seems to be "let's pick up and move on so everything will be back to normal again". Except it won't be; and I don't think she wants to deal with that thought.
I further think that she takes out her anger on Simon, her new love interest, because he isn't Derek and he will never be Derek. I could be off base with that assumption, but that's what I gathered. I think she just wants a simple life with the person she lost but she can't have that now and slowly I think she's realizing it. But she'll settle for Simon if he would just put a ring on her finger and give her the comfort, or maybe the stability that I don't think she ever felt with anyone but Derek. Of course forcing him to do that is pushing him away slowly but surely.
This is what I'm saying: Farrah, I get you girl. It sucks to grow up in a super comfortable life with parents that love you and give you everything but to still feel a hole in your heart. So to fix this hole we run out and look for a guy to fix it because he'll love us and show us the attention we were lacking somewhere. I get it. It sucks though when you think you find that person and then something happens to burst your perfect bubble of comfort you thought you found. No one should have to suffer the loss of someone they love. That is the worst pain any human can ever feel. The fact that Farrah is still walking around with half the good sense she has is a miracle. She has refused to lay down and give up. She gets up every day and from what we see on screen, she does the best she can with being a good mom. Given the examples of parenting and relationships she got from her parents, it's amazing how well she's doing.
Again, I could be totally off base with all of this. But I think Farrah is just like the rest of us. The only difference is her mistakes and bad days are broadcast for the whole world to see and ours can be kept hidden.