Ah, dartying. It's finally the time of year where porches and front yards in Michigan can actually be put to use. Everyone comes out of the hibernation some people call "winter" and the first thing on everyone's agenda? Darty. In case you're not familiar with the coined hybrid phrase, though it's pretty self explanatory, it means day party. And it's everything college kids in the spring want and more.
We all like to drink at night. It's fun and great, and it's been going on all winter. But dartying is a whole new world. If you find a day where you have no pressing business or responsibilities—or choose to simply ignore them—fill it with darties. It's the best invention since the bottling of cinnamon gum with alcohol that we now call Fireball. But, you can't just be a dartying champ right off the get-go.
I'm here to give you a few lessons, young dartiers.
1. Prepare for the day of indulging by not getting super-hammered the night before and maybe even sleeping a little extra. No need for one drink to feel like three just because you're tired or still drunk from the night before.
2. Actually eat breakfast. Preferably something that contains bread. When you'll be going all day, you need something to help you keep going. Few of us can actually master the good ol' puke and rally while still having a good time. If you eat breakfast, or lunch depending on the start time of the darty, you'll be good for at least a few hours.
3. Also on the topic of food, perks of day drinking means by the time you're ready for drunchies, it's not 2 a.m. and your options of open food places are basically endless. If you plan on rallying for the night, you'll need substantial energy to be drunk for the second half of your alcohol binge (Sorry, mom).
4. Dress the part. There's a drastic difference between what you wear out at night and what to wear to a darty. Darty apparel is half the effort and twice the comfort, cute yet comfy. It's something in between what you would wear to class and out at night. Or a jersey. A jersey always works.
5. Ease into it. You know how sometimes you're like "Okay, I'm too sober for this. I should probably just down a bunch of shots really quick, and it'll be way more fun?" This isn't exactly a darty state of mind. As the day goes on, it usually gets more fun. You don't want to pass out while you're ahead. You're in it for the long haul.
6. Darty hop. Because you can't just have one.
7. Rally. The best part about a darty is that it doesn't have to end when it starts getting dark out. After you get your Chipotle, Taco Bell, McDonald's—whatever the munchy to your drunchy is - you can continue the fun into the night. Don't forget to drink a little water in between to combat a potential hangover from hell.
8. Stay safe and smart. Boring, yet necessary lesson. With darties, things can get a little out of control around 4 p.m. Just excercise logic so your fun day stays fun.
9. Take full advantage of darty days. We only have a few more years when drinking all day is acceptable. Make the most out of them.
