Are you tall? Are you sure? If you're a female and above 5'8", there's a chance that you may, in fact, be affected with tallness. Here are the key ways to determine if your height is above average.
1. People constantly remark on your height.
If it's the second thing someone says to you immediately after meeting you, there's a good chance you could be tall. Although commenting on a woman's weight is a major social no-no, apparently the game changes for other units of measurement. Most likely, people are constantly reminding you of this fact because, on some obscure level, it is considered a compliment and you wouldn't want to go a day without being reminded of it.
2. People assume you play sports.
Another tall person stereotype is that all tall human beings are athletically gifted. The confusing factor here is that many good athletes also happen to be tall. However, not all tall people are athletes. If any generalization is to be made about tallness, it's that awkwardness and a lack of coordination are far more likely to be the diagnosis.
3. The cuffed jean look was a godsend.
Finding pants that are long enough without reverting back to the boot-cut jean trend of the early 2000's is a tricky situation for a tall person. Thank goodness America finally jumped on the faux European fashion bandwagon and started rolling their jeans at the ankles. It's finally socially acceptable to flash a little ankle skin, and tall ladies in casual wear everywhere are rejoicing.
4. Your friends make you reach for their stuff.
Items not immediately within the reach of the average person become your "area of expertise" as a tall person. Although it can get annoying to constantly help people with their reaching problems, it is nice to be needed by the less fortunate, and you have gotten used to being exploited for your advanced range of motion. From Christmas lights to pots and pans, anything that is located up high falls on your shoulders to retrieve. What a time to be alive.
5. You always are sent to the back in group pictures.
"All tall people in the back" is a phrase you are used to hearing, and being the floating head in the back of photos is your identity. And if you're not straining to get your face visible behind everyone else, you're awkwardly contorting into some sorority-squat pose with your shorter fellow humans. It's really a no-solution situation.
6. One size fits all is a lie.
For some reason, companies believe that this phrase could actually be universal for all people. When will clothing brands learn that tights and knee high socks cannot possibly be one size fits all for tall individuals? Side note: online shopping for clothes is a minefield for this reason, too.
7. Hugs can get weird fast.
This one doesn't need much explanation. Add one short guy. Subtract you paying attention. Do the height math.
8. Light fixtures are seriously hazardous.
Classy restaurants are war zones for the tall woman – especially when you add heels to the equation. Chandeliers and fancy hanging glass lamps are generally the perpetrators of these awkward run-ins, so being vigilant when on a date or nice dinner out is a must.
Now that you have read this brief guide, I hope you are able to determine if you are, in fact, tall.
