1. When happiness comes later for you and sooner for others.
Knowing your worth without getting big-headed is a character-building goal. You know that it will do you good in the long run, but sometimes making others happy leaves your happiness trailing behind. Without being selfish, your happiness is important too. Pleasing everyone is already a misguided mentality. You have to be happy with and for yourself, that way it can benefit you and others around you.
2. When you don't receive recognition.
Standing out can be a difficult task when so many people are working towards the same thing. Being self-aware of your efforts when no one else is one of the most frustrating moments in your personal life and work life. Doing a good job is enough for you but being ignored for it makes you feel underappreciated and expendable. Surround yourself with people who care about the work you do and in time others will care about you too.
3. When intentions do not match.
You know the grass is green, but the person you work for or the significant other you're with says it's blue. Miscommunication is understandable and can be corrected, but for someone to purposely do wrong by you is unacceptable. Being on the same page shows respect and accountability. When someone has their own agenda, especially one that uses you to reach their self-interest, it is time to move on.
4. When pros and cons feel the same.
The feeling that things are what they are is a limitation and a false promise waiting to be realized. Sleepwalking through life is an option, but it is not the most fulfilling option. On the one hand, you have the status quo, the ordinary and the conventional. On the other hand, you have the unexpected, the unique potential for more. When life gives you lemons, make lemonade, but also lemon tarts, lemon chicken, and anything you can reinvent with that lemon.
5. When your days are filled with monotony.
"If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I'm about to do today?" Steve Jobs said this when he spent too many days doing what he no longer enjoyed. Sometimes you have to make a change when nothing is changing. Build your own bridge, carve your own path, go towards the light in your life and it will never stop shining. When you need precedence in your life, take the steps that will help you move onto that journey and destination.
Moving on is natural.
I Limited My Social Media Usage And I Challenge You To, Too
My worth is not defined by the amount of likes I get.
Every morning at 8 a.m., my alarm goes off, I roll over, and the first thing I do is check my Snapchat only to open a bunch of pictures of the top of someone's head, or the wall, or — my favorite — a black screen. This is something we're all guilty of, myself included. We all know that social media is becoming an addiction amongst us, so why do we still use them in an unhealthy way? Why are our friendships defined by who has the longest streak? Why are our perceptions of others based on the most perfectly posed presentations of people? Why is our self-worth dependent on the number of double taps or shares or comments?
My world used to revolve around social media.
Every time I posted a picture on Instagram, I would constantly refresh to see how many likes I had accumulated. The worst part about that is I would get upset if I didn't get any likes in the seconds between each refresh.
If I got bored or had some downtime between classes, I would spend hours just scrolling through the same posts, hoping to find something different.
So much of my life was wrapped up in the superficiality of social media posts to the point where I no longer knew who I was. I would see pictures of my friends who ended up at the same college and feel left out, I would see girls from high school joining sororities, I would see people looking so stunning and having so much fun, and I let that be the thing that influenced how I felt.
Social media consumed me. It made me forget all the wonderful things I have in my life. It made me value a photo opportunity more than just enjoying the moment for what it is. Let me tell you that a moment is no less valuable just because it isn't visually appealing.
I've recently started using the Screen Time feature on my iPhone. I set a two hour per day limit on my social media usage, and when that time is up, I can no longer open the apps. Since then, I've been spending more time face-to-face with the people I care about. I've reconnected with old hobbies. I feel less stressed. I stopped comparing myself to others. I learned to be happy with myself.
I limit my social media usage because all the time I've spent aimlessly scrolling through Instagram is time I could've spent going for a walk and enjoying the warmth of Spring.
I limit my social media usage because I value face-to-face interaction. I value hugs and laughter and all the other things you can't get from a screen.
I limit my social media usage because it hurts my feelings when other people are on their phones when I'm trying to talk to them so how can it be right that I do that to someone else?
I think about how dependent on social media we have become, and it makes me so grateful that the sun is too bright to see our phone screens outside and that the mountains raise too high to have good cell service. I'm grateful that my friends make me laugh so hard that I don't even think to check my phone.
So, I challenge you to separate yourself from your social media. Even if it's just for a day. See how your life changes.