An excerpt from Beguiled
No, this will not do. Even after he kidnapped her and brought her here, she still forgave him. What is it going to take for me to win her hand? She was more beautiful than I remembered. She would make a worthy queen to be at my side. No Archer, stop thinking like that. I only want the throne; I couldn't care less about the girl. The feelings I'd had for her had disappeared a long time ago. They walked out, holding hands for goodness sake! Why does he have to be so good? How am I supposed to compete with that? My mind drifted back to the scintillating way she moved. The blush that had filled her cheeks when I had pressed my lips to the soft skin of her hands. I sighed in exasperation. I began to feel things I hadn't in years, stirring beneath the surface. That girl was going to be my downfall. I could feel it. I thought back to the day she had been sent to the mortal world.
She smiled as she pulled me into her bed chambers. She had kissed me as if it were going to be the last chance she'd ever have. Her smile fell. I knew then that something was wrong.
"Talya, what is it?"
"They're sending me away; they're going to take my memories. I won't know who you are anymore."
"What? They can't do that! No, I won't let them. I.. I love you, Talya," I'd never said those words to her. I'd been so afraid, and now I was going to lose her.
"I love you too, Archer. I'll remember you, one way or another. I will remember you, and I will come back to you. I have to go now," she kissed me again.
"No, please don't go. I can't; I can't do this without you."
"Yes, you can. You have to. Please stay strong for me. Stay strong for us. I will be back for you."
She placed both hands on the sides of my face. I pulled her tightly to my chest, hugging her tightly. I could feel her breathing shallow. Her shoulders shook with sobs as she broke away. I held out my hand. I brushed my fingertips against hers. She then turned and walked out of the room. I had failed her. I wasn't strong enough to carry our love alone.
All of the anguish from that day came bubbling up, my throat tightened. No, that wasn't me anymore. I'd purposely hardened my heart over the years. Otherwise, the sorrow would have overwhelmed me. I had lost the only girl I'd ever loved. Now she was back and didn't even remember me. How could I have been so stupid? Thinking she would keep her promise. I slammed the side of my fist against the wall in frustration. I paced back and forth through the throne room.
The way Talya had reacted to me brought back a lot of memories. I'm sure she thought she'd hid it well, but I'd always been able to read her better than most. She had that same strong will. This mortal version was feistier than she had been before. If possible, it made me love her more.
Why am I doing this to myself? She isn't who she used to be. She doesn't remember who I am. There is no point in wasting my time on these petty feelings. Love is beneath me now. I'm a different person.