19 Childhood Stories That Will 100 Percent Give You Second-Hand Embarrassment
And I thought my life was embarrassing.
Were you ever really a child unless you did something so embarrassing that it causes you to stay awake at night? We all have--it's just a part of human nature. The good thing though is that we are able to laugh at it, so take a look at these 18 childhood stories that will definitely give you second-hand embarrassment.
*Responses have been edited for length and clarity purposes.*
1. We all question what a urinal is at some point in our life.
"In 1st grade, we had a bathroom in the classroom that had a urinal and a toilet. I didn't know what the urinal was, so I peed in it and peed all over myself and started crying. I had to tell my teacher in front of my whole class."
-Female, 19
2. Flashing the entire recess yard is always a super fun memory.
"I was wearing a new, super cute dress to school in 3rd grade and I was going down the side at recess. It was a bit windy out, my dress blew up, and both sides of the dress somehow caught on each side of the slide. And because of the wonders of physics, I still kept traveling down the slide even though my dress stayed put. So there I was sitting at the end of the slide in just my underwear with my new, super cute dress still stuck at the top of the slide."
-Anonymous
3. Let's be real: who WOULDN'T want to eat a purple crayon?
"I ate a jumbo purple Crayola crayon on the first day of kindergarten and threw up purple all over one of the other kids in my class."
-Anonymous
4. Mac and Cheese is actually the hardest recipe to make.
"I asked my brother how to make mac and cheese- he told me to just put in a bowl and throw it in the microwave. So I did, without water. I nearly caused the microwave to explode and gave the house a nice charred smell for about a day."
-Male, 24
5. When you're such a picky eater, you throw up just to prove a point.
"I was a picky eater as a child and at a Thanksgiving dinner, my family made me try mashed potatoes. Needless to say, I threw up and cried at the table. It is still mentioned at holiday gatherings 30 some years later."
-Female, 36
6. It actually makes sense to be this high maintenance for your birthday party.
Personal Photograph Provided By Recipient
"I had a short fuse as a child and had zero patience with kids much younger than me. So I made a list of rules to follow at my birthday party. I clearly didn't want little kids there, to begin with."
-Anonymous
7. This one is actually more common than you think!
"I was about 14 years old (so long past the bed wetting stage), and I had a dream in which I needed to pee. Well, I was in such a deep sleep and my dream was so realistic that I ended up wetting the bed. I was so embarrassed that I tried washing my sheets in the middle of the night without my parents noticing but that didn't work out so well. I also still have a slight fear to this day that this could happen again so I always try to go to the bathroom like 3 times before I go to bed."
-Anonymous
8. This dad went overboard to embarrass his daughter.
"My dad used to take me to the drive-thru movie with my friends and he would get on the top of the car and howl like a wolf just to embarrass me. And whenever a boy would pick me up on a date he would tell them that whenever I chewed a piece of gum I would stick it to my bedpost so I could have it for later."
-Female, 49
9. It's O.K., we've all been there.
"When you decide you go down the slide after a rainy day and end up walking through halls looking like you peed yourself."
-Female, 21
10. This is actually a pretty common mistake, too.
"Up until I was 13 my older brother had me convinced that marshmallows were made purely out of animal fat."
-Female, 18
11. Lesson learned: Mom knows best
"My mother told me and my 3 friends not to go to Tacony Creek Park because it was near the projects. This was in the '80s and I was 14-years-old. We rode our bikes through the park anyway and got jumped under the Roosevelt Boulevard underpass. Several adult men stole our bikes and our sneakers. Had to walk home barefoot without bikes or sneakers with facial bruises. My Mom did not call the cops and said we deserved it. Lesson learned...listen to Mom"
-Male, 48
12. Personal hygiene is important and everyone SHOULD know it.
"When I was about 5 years old my mom took me to an event called Morning Stars. Of course, after being there for a while we needed to use the restroom. After taking care of business we were washing our hands when I saw a lady exit a bathroom stall and head straight for the door. I yelled, "Hey lady, you forgot to wash your hands!" My mom tried to hush me. But another lady was drying her hands. The lady chuckled and told my mom that I was right."
-Anonymous
13. I guess this person was just like a moth drawn to a flame.
"I touched a burning hot light bulb right before I left for school. When I explained to my teacher why my fingers were all bandaged and why I couldn't write that day, she burst into laughter."
-Anonymous
14. Every girl lives in constant fear that this might happen.
"As a young lady, I severely struggled with my menstrual cycles. One day a teacher assistant walked up to me and very quietly told me that she needed to see me in the hallway. She took her jacket and wrapped it around my waist to hide my bottom. She said that I had bled so hard that it was all over the seat and dripping onto the floor. My mom came to pick me up since I obviously needed a shower and not just a change of clothes. I am so thankful that lady helped me out, I, unfortunately, can't even remember her name."
-Anonymous
15. Anyone would be embarrassed after this.
"When you have a crush on a guy for 6 years and refuse to date anyone else until he pulls you aside and says "I need to tell you something" and he goes "I'm gay."
-Anonymous
16. Ah yes, middle school love. Tell me this isn't the beginning to a YA love story.
"When I was in 8th grade I was crushing really hard on a kid, so on the last day of school, I dressed up really cute and tried to get him to notice me. He didn't even look in my general direction until I was trying to step over a yellow rope on the side of a soccer field to go inside the school and my flip flop got caught on it and I fell face forward onto the cement that was on the other side of the rope."
-Female, 20
17. This is why I hate the ocean. Such a traitor.
"I was at the beach swimming in the ocean when I was stripped of my bathing suit top and flashed a little kid and his father. I had to run to my mom topless down the beach trying to cover myself."
-Female, 18
18. This one could've ended so badly.
"I once almost peed on a rattlesnake."
-Male, 15
19. At least your embarrassing story didn't cost another family thousands of dollars.
"One time I peed my pants in my friend's dad's car after his birthday party. I then proceeded to do it again 6 minutes later. They had to get a whole new car because I ruined their seats so badly."
-Anonymous
Don't forget that although these moments may have been embarrassing back then, there's always room to laugh at them now! Thank you for everyone who was brave enough to share an embarrassing moment with me!