A presidential primary election peppered with Orwellian nominees from both major political parties has left many in the U.S. throwing their hands up in frustration. However, there may be one “candidate” just below the radar who trumps the publicity-stunting and sound-biting presumed winners on the GOP or Dem side. His name is Vermin Love Supreme, and he may be more transparent than any opponent. He dons a boot for a hat and carries a bright red toothbrush. Really. Nonetheless, upon further inspection he is the most logical candidate for the presidency.

Initially, Supreme’s haggard appearance, footwear for headwear and toothbrush scepter are out of place in the political arena. But then, compare his appearance to Republican front runner Donald Trump’s micro-hands and thousands of dollars in Sephora primer, concealer, foundation and strobing powder (under the eyes alone). One may question whether Supreme’s getup came from the same stylist. Go on to compare his persona to Democratic front runner Hillary Clinton’s painfully shrill tone and purse full of hot sauce. One may question whether he learned his song and dance from the same choreographer.

In the past, Supreme ran unsuccessful campaigns for the 2004 and 2008 Presidential Primaries, where he was ticketed as a Republican candidate. For the 2016 Presidential election, he has chosen to run as a Democrat with the campaign slogan, “RIDING OUR PONIES INTO A ZOMBIE POWERED FUTURE”. It is clear that he works across party lines. With a Boston-area origin and a good dose of mystery in his personal background, Supreme proposes four, clearly stated campaign promises: tooth-brushing mandated by law, funding for time travel research, national zombie preparedness, and a pony for every American (Dicker, 2016). The 2016 election could prove to be his most successful. He earned 256 votes in the New Hampshire primary election in February. Here he also finished fourth for NH Democratic nominees, over-all totaling more votes than mainstream contenders Mike Huckabee and Rick Santorum (Brennan, 2016).

The political romancing of the masses has reached a fever pitch during recent months, and the election doesn’t begin until November 8. The underlying reason for the wild success of Twitter Wars, name-calling and mudslinging in 2016 is a malfunctioning overreach of political satire. By all indication, politicians and media politicos alike are assuming voters are purring at the attention. The news’ transformation into entertainment news is old-hat, but the salaciousness of politics is bogging down the purpose of lawmaking, governing, and furthering the interests of the public. Yet, much of the public are expressing interest in the antics of a sometimes laughable political system by either “liking” on Facebook or standing idly by. Then, is it wrong for politicians vying for the public’s votes to indulge?

The U.S. has long relished First Amendment freedom of speech privileges allowing for political satire. It predates even its own Amendment; during the American Revolution political cartoons appeared like Ben Franklin’s severed snake told the colonies to “Join or Die”. Current political satires, however, are occurring under the guise of serious rhetoric. When a candidate spouts a derogatory catchphrase, and it’s taken to such extremes that rallies become riots, the audience’s understanding for an underlying “spirit of the game” has been washed away. The colorful language and invigorating messages mused on campaign stops are wholeheartedly believed by few but passively replayed by millions on YouTube. The very nuance that makes satire effective is its ability to highlight injustice through humorous mimicry, but candidates seem to be throwing one-liners without furthering any meaningful political messages. The value in Vermin Supreme, as University of Oregon student Dani Ghem explains in paper published to the campaign’s website, is that the ridiculousness actually encourages viewers to engage in and pay attention to the political system while he is through all the motions of a true politician (2012).

Supreme, in fact, is a performance artist, and showmanship has become a strong but unacknowledged political strategy. Following this playbook, the quirky candidate is actually on the right track for the Presidency. His campy image and nonsensical stumping promises achieve the right tone of political satire, where the “serious” candidates are attempting to relabel jest as sustenance. The hyperbolic Supreme puts voters in on the joke, while still shining light on the existing absurdity in presidential campaigns. He encourages us to get involved and brush our teeth before putting tongue-in-cheek. The use of political satire is a valuable one, and may be effectively used by the public to criticize government, or by politicians to criticize the status quo. It is the understanding of an underlying critical message which makes it work, and it appears that in the 2016 presidential election* it’s up to voters to find the punchline.

*It is the opinion of the author that every vote truly does count. To thoughtfully decide if you should be Voting Vermin, visit his

campaign website, his Facebook page or watch his speech at a primary debate at Saint Anslem College, NH.