Hey, you, It's me.
Chances are you haven't been too well lately, and that's perfectly OK. Just know that everything does eventually get better.
You have been on a long and seemingly never-ending journey for the last couple of years and deserve a break. Take the time to relax! Whether that means taking a well-deserved three-hour nap, or binge-watching Netflix, take some time off and focus on yourself.
Throughout the years you have pushed yourself beyond your own limits just to keep up with everyone else when you and I both know that we want to go at our own slow and steady pace. When you push yourself further than you can, you have to realize how much stress you're putting on yourself — it's unnatural to go that far beyond your own limit.
Yes, it is OK to do this every once in a while, but days and days of continuous push and stress will not lead anywhere positive.
I have seen you in times of happiness after acing a test, distress with your self-image, joy every time your family brought a new cat home, panic when presenting a class project that you've stressed about for the last week and a half, and everything in between. I've experienced the times where you felt alone and unloveable along with you, it's OK, I know exactly what you felt.
That feeling you have when you know exactly what to say but cannot come up with any words to express yourself, I get it.
That's why you try and try to convey your thoughts into written words in hopes of just one person understanding you. You write sentences over and over again in hopes of making them shorter because run-on sentences become harder to read. I get it, and you're not alone.
You have taken steps to better yourself and I'm so beyond proud of you.
You have choices to make, but extreme indecisiveness and fear of making a mistake always stop you. If you make a decision that you believe is better for you, what if you're wrong? What if your choice sends you into a life of regret and ultimate distress? Please stop worrying about these situations, "what if" questions are just that: questions. If you feel like a decision will make your future better, just go for it. It affects you in a bad way at the moment, but your future self will be happy... hopefully.
I wish you the best in the future and know you can do it. No matter what life throws at you just remember to stay positive because no matter what you think, or how you feel, you are always loved by me. Sometimes it's not expressed too well, but it's always deep down in my heart.
Finally, be true to yourself. Don't feel the need to change to fit any social standards. You're amazing and unique just the way you are.
If you're ever in a bad place, I hope you remember to read this.
Good luck, you got this.
