Do you recall a time when you chose to be straight? Or a time when you chose to be gay?
Yeah, me neither.
Because if I actually had a choice, there was a time when I would have said that I would choose to be straight. I don't think that anymore.
If I had chosen to be straight, my life would be a lot easier and here is why:
1. My parents wouldn't look so disappointed when I mention a girl's name.
2. When someone asks "Do you have a boyfriend?" I could answer them and not look so awkward about it.
3. I would feel more comfortable holding a girl's hand in public or kissing her if I feel like it.
4. It would be easier to meet potential significant others, instead of trying to guess which girls are into other girls at the bar or wherever else I may be.
5. I would be considered "normal".
There are probably a lot of other reasons why it would be easier to be straight, but that's not really the point of this article.
The point is why I "choose" to be gay:
Because it's who I am.
I'm no different than anyone else. I'm no less and I'm no more. I'm just me. I smile more than I probably should, I roll my eyes at everyone and everything, and I'm one of the biggest sarcastic a**holes you will ever meet. But I also have one of the biggest hearts and best senses of humor, because I like to make people happy. And none of that has anything to do with my sexuality.
I hid my sexuality from others for a long period of time. I think I actually hid it from myself even longer. I kept thinking "You just haven't met the right guy yet. When you do, everything will feel right". I couldn't have been more wrong. I also was worried for years of what my family and friends would think. I was afraid of what they would say and do and if they would even want to be associated with me anymore. But as soon as I got over it, I realized they were over it, too.
Quite recently I was on a date with a girl that I haven't known very long. We had only been talking for a few weeks and had gone out once previously. We were sitting at an outdoor pub, just drinking a beer, talking and getting to know each other. I'm sure we were leaned in close to each other, laughing and flirting like most people do on dates. I didn't think much of it. Until a girl, probably late 20s, comes up to us and says,
"I'm not sure if you two are a couple or not, but you guys are seriously so cute together!"
I looked at my date and we both smiled. We thanked her and she walked back to her friends.
I will never forget that moment because it honestly made me speechless. Here is this woman, who doesn't even know me, encouraging me to live my life and be who I am. Being attracted to girls wasn't my choice. It is just the way I am and I have finally accepted that. I can only hope all of you will accept that too. Not just for me, but for your family and friends that may be struggling with a hidden sexuality too.
Be more like the random girl at the bar. We need more of her.
See what people said when asked when they chose to be straight:
