Stop expecting someone else to fix it

Stop expecting someone else to fix it

We are all human, so help build up.

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What are we doing? I sat in my office working on layouts for the magazine and suddenly caught myself dazing off and just staring out the window. I locked vision on a single tree which was across the street from me and within about 15 seconds, I heard sirens. I continued to stare at this small dainty tree as police cars and fire engines sped through. I have no idea where they were going, I have no idea what occurred to cause them to flee, but I do know I didn't think anything of it.

About 45 minutes after that moment, I took my lunch break and was driving through town and suddenly saw red and blue lights flashing in my rear-view mirror, so of course, I pulled to the side. It was another set of fire engine's zooming behind a few ambulances. Again, what's there to think about? This happens every day. I live directly across the street from the Fire Department, if anyone knows how many times the fire engines leave the station it would be my family. Then it hit me. How are we used to this?

We see emergency vehicles and think that's normal. We no longer think of where they are going or whether a family is in need or a child is hurt. We think that someone else will take care of it…

That's where we fall short.

We cannot keep on expecting other people to help everyone. Now I am not here saying that every time you see a car accident then run to the rescue and act like the hero. You will more than likely hurt yourself and then call for another paramedic. I am saying that if someone's car is stuck on the side of the road, pull over and see if they need help. If there is a kid looking lost and scared at the state fair, take them to find their parent. If a dog is running up and down your neighborhood, call the number on their tag.

It is not hard. It is an inconvenience at most times, but it is not hard.

If we are translating this into our personal lives, we expect what we don't give out. We don't think about it until it affects our own personal lives and that is not going to spark any change in the world. Take, for example, medical aid and research. Now anything involving a hospital stay and medication is a scary topic, but we are so invested in our own lives that we don't think about the statistics from patients suffering from cancer. We ignore the donation jars at restaurants, the calls asking for money, the red cross emails.

We avoid it.

Until we are the ones sitting in that Florissant lit room smelling hand sanitizer in our cold hospital food. That is when we start panicking thinking, "how is no one working to fix this, no one is pushing for change". The ones who are trying to take action are being ignored by the masses because people are selfish by nature. Yes, there are good-hearted people who will donate every dollar they have, but do we think about people on the other end of the line hoarding in thousands and millions of dollars? Do we realize many of these are scams and money-making schemes? Do we push for change in a society where those we act like they care are acting scamming you?

As you think over that fun topic, consider what is happening at this moment over the border of the United States and Mexico. Children are being stripped of their livelihoods and parents as they try to make a change in their lives. Do you think any immigrant would be dumb enough to try and cross if they had any other choice? THEY NEED HELP AND WE ARE LITERALLY SLAMMING A DOOR IN THEIR FACE. They risk their lives to bring their family out of poverty, disease, illness, and terror, and what is their reward for trying to save their family? Having their family taken from them.

If we don't care who will? They won't be free or safe until they have someone who cares and says enough is enough. Right now we are silent because it "doesn't affect me". You are incorrect and it is the same as bi-standing in a fight or even recording and laughing as the weaker kid keeps getting kicked to the ground.

"Without a sense of caring, there can be no sense of community"

-Anthony J. D'Angelo

I am a first generation American in my family. I am born of Zoroastrian faith on American soil and I could not be prouder of my family lineage, and it breaks my heart to watch families sacrifice everything they have to protect their loved ones just to be told they aren't worth it.

My parents had their green cards for YEARS. My mom took nearly 18 years to develop full US Citizenship, or else she would have been thrown to the curb. It is not because she was procrastinating or being lazy, it is because the process requires so much to just be qualified, and you know where all those qualification records go? They sit stacked on tables, minimized on web browsers, because why should we rush the process?

People don't care until it is them being affected and that is what is so sad about society. Instead of building a wall, why don't we evaluate how to fix the issue, not generate more hatred for our country. Instead of calling that Indian kid a terrorist, why not let your child play with him? Instead of accusing that black man of theft, why not offer him a job? Instead of ignoring that homeless man, why don't you hear his story?

We are all skin and bone. We all breathe the same air, share the same soil, and drink the same water. When it rains, it does not skip over the white, black, Asian, Indian, Russian, or any other house. It rains on us all. We all pollute the earth, we all have flaws and issues, but we are all loved by more than ourselves. We are all humans and to put it into another light, think of bricks.

Bricks are sturdy alone, but stronger in masses, so why would we sacrifice our strength for our egos? You don't want people to enjoy freedom as much as you? Don't you think they deserve a happier and safer life? Are you just angry at them for trying to survive?

We need to stop the conflict and learn to prioritize the good of people before the glorification of superiority. You can rule all you want in an empty kingdom, but what is that worth?

If we could learn to stop passing laws to avoid an issue and in return FIX THE ISSUE, the world would be a lot easier to open your eyes to. Stop picking on the small guy. Stop expecting someone else to take care of other problems and stop assuming that it isn't a big deal. Because to someone, it is their entire life at risk, and we can all do something to help strike change.

Cover Image Credit:

Tish Cama

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I'm That Girl With A Deep Voice, But I'm Not Some Freak Of Nature

I have learned to hold back tears when someone tells me that I sound like a man.

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My voice is deep. Always has been, always will be. I joke that rather than getting higher, my voice got lower throughout puberty.

My voice is deep. Always has been, always will be. I have learned to laugh when my family members say "Hi Todd" when they pick up the phone when I call. Todd is my brother. I am a girl.

My voice is deep. Always has been, always will be. I have learned to laugh when I have been asked by other females if they're "in the right bathroom" when I tell them "I'm not in line" or "someone's in here" when there's a knock on the stall.

Keep in mind that in most female bathrooms, there are no urinals present and there is a sign outside the door that says "WOMEN." Quite obviously, they're in the correct bathroom, just thrown off by the octave of my voice.

For the girl who asked me if she was in the right bathroom because she was "caught off guard and thought I was a boy," I'm just wondering...

What part about my long hair, mascara, shorts not down to my knees, presence (small presence, but a presence none the less) of boobs, and just my overall demeanor was not enough validation that you are, in fact, in the correct restroom?

My voice is deep. Always has been, always will be. I have learned to hold back tears when someone tells me that I sound like a man. Or, when someone calls me over to talk to their friends so they can see how "offsetting" my voice sounds to them.

My favorite story is when I was in a store, and I asked one of the women there a question about a product.

This woman had the audacity to ask me when I "went through my transformation."

She was suggesting that I was a transgender girl because of the sound of my voice. Please recognize that I respect and wholeheartedly accept the trans- population. Please also recognize that I was born a girl, still am a girl, always will be a girl, and asking someone if they are a different gender than they appear to be is not the best way to make a sale.

Frustrated, I told her that she should find a better plastic surgeon and walked out.

My voice is deep. Always has been, always will be.

And, to make matters worse, I am not your typical "girly-girl."

I die for the New York Rangers, have maybe two dresses in my closet but three shelves full of hand-me-down sweatshirts from my brother and Adidas pants. I do not own a "blouse" nor do I plan on owning one except maybe for business-casual occasions.

Naturally, when a deep voice is paired with a sports-oriented, athletic short-loving, sarcastic girl who couldn't tell you the difference between a stiletto and an average high-heel, I GUESS things can seem "off." However, regardless of the difference you see/hear, no one has the right to make someone feel bad about themselves.

What I always struggled with the most is how (most, moral, common-sense) people will never tell someone they don't know, who may be overweight, that "they're fat" or that they don't like the shirt that they're wearing. Yet, because my voice is not something physically seen, it has become fair game for strangers and acquaintances alike to judge and make comments about.

I used to break down into hysterics when I heard a comment about my voice, whether I was six years old or seventeen years old.

There are times that I still do because I am so fed up and just completely bamboozled by the fact that at the age of twenty, there are still people who just have a blatant disregard for others' feelings and a lack of understanding of what is okay to say and what is not okay to say.

But, just like I ask those people not to judge me, I suppose I can't judge them on their lack of common sense and respect for others.

I'd be lying if I said that the hundreds of thousands of comments I've heard and received targeted at my voice growing up did not play a role in my life. I used to want to be a sports broadcaster. I no longer want to be heard on the radio or seen on TV; snarky comments about my voice being one of the reasons why (among others, like a change of interest and just overall life experiences).

I'd be lying if I said that my struggle with public speaking didn't partially stem from negative feedback about my voice.

I'd be lying if I said that there weren't days I tried to talk as little as possible because I didn't want to be judged and that I am sometimes hesitant to introduce myself to new people because I'm scared my voice will scare them away.

I would also be lying if I said that my voice didn't make me who I am.

I joke constantly about it now, because half the shit that comes out of my mouth mixed with my actions, interests, beliefs, etc., would sound absolutely WHACK if I had a high-pitched "girly" voice.

My voice matches my personality perfectly, and the criticism I have and continue to receive for my "manly" sounding voice has helped shaped me into who I am today. I have learned to love my voice when people have relentlessly tried to make me hate it. I have learned to take the frustration I felt towards my voice and turn it into sympathy for those who have something going on in their life, and therefore feel compelled to make a comment about me, a stranger's voice, to make themselves feel better.

I've learned that to laugh at yourself is to love yourself.

And, I say this not for sympathy. Not for someone to say, "Wait, Syd, I love your voice!"

I say this because I want it to be a reminder for people to watch what they say, and use that noggin before you speak. I say this because I also want to be the voice (haha, get it, 'voice') for those who feel like they've lost theirs.

My voice is deep. Always has been, always will be. And I wouldn't have it any other way.

So no, I would not be a good alto in a choir because I think I'm tone deaf. And, when you call MY phone number, it is very unlikely that it is my brother or dad answering. Just say hello, because 99.9% of the time, if it's ME you're calling, it's ME that's answering.

Dr. Suess said, "A person's a person no matter how small."

Now I'm saying, "A girl is a girl no matter her octave."

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Accomplish Your Goals, Don't Fear Them

You've set goals, now it is time to work towards them.

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Fearing something that has yet to happen wastes time that you could actually use to better yourself.

And that is exactly what I plan on fixing NOW and so should you. Yes, I do fear the act of growing but it won't stop me. Some days, it seems so hard just to keep going. You can have your long-term goals in sight, but yet you are questioning if what you currently have to do in order to get there is worth it.

Then I remember, nothing was achieved in the comfort zone. Everything I want is not where I am currently today. Rather it is located in places I have yet to tap into. I must get there. We must get there. To places that really push us as nothing has before. With this great push will come the tremendous growth that we need. It doesn't matter how long it takes us to get there, we just must keep going.

I am going to end by saying this: it's okay to be scared, but don't let it stop you. You have to find your voice even when it's lost among others no matter how hard it gets or how inconsequential you think your ideas may be.

Work hard to prove to yourself and others that you indeed can do it. Find your passion in life and run with it hard. Working towards your goals no matter what they are, will be hard. Yes, you will have success, but there will also be seasons of doubt. In those seasons, you must find ways to overcome them.

Imagine if you decide to stay where you were right now; would you be happy? Would you be happy and content with what you have accomplished? If not, work on fixing that. The time is now to figure out your hopes and dreams and work towards getting to that point. There are 24 hours in a day and today is the day to start making the change we desire.


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