My current major is speech pathology and I’m also getting a minor in advanced behavioral assessment. What I want to do with that is work with autistic children, or children with special needs (again I just finished freshman year, so in all honesty I still am not 100 percent sure what I want to do). I changed my major only last semester, and already I’ve been surprised with the responses I’ve gotten when people ask. People say, “Oh, that’s going to be hard.” Or, “I could never do that; I couldn’t handle it.” My least favorite response has been, “They are going to be a handful.”
The first thing that bothers me is that people act as if I just chose this major out of a hat and have no idea at all what it entails. I’ve thought about this for a long time. I’ve been thinking about this major since my sophomore year of high school. I chose against it going into my freshman year because I allowed other people's doubts to become my own.
That’s the second thing that bothers me: People keep filling my head with more doubts. Almost everyday I think about my future, wondering if I picked the right major, and if I’ll be able to handle it, I don’t need anyone else adding to that stress and worry. People have told me if I’m doubting myself already, it’s probably not for me, but I can’t accept that. I think everyone doubts their decisions in college and constantly asks themselves if they will be enough for their desired career. I know adults with established, successful careers who still question if they are enough. I don’t know if I’ll be enough, but I do know I want this, and I’m motivated to achieve this, and I think that’s all that really matters.
My least favorite thing about the comments I receive is when people make children with special needs sound like a burden. They act as if I and other people in this field are saints for taking on the horrifying and impossible task of working with people who develop, learn, and function a little bit differently from the rest of society. They aren’t burdens; they are people. They are also not their disabilities. They are not a bunch of autistic kids, they are children who have interests and goals, personalities, and hobbies, who also happen to have autism. The chances I’ve had to volunteer with children with autism have been amazing. I loved it; the children were awesome, and I felt guilty for being afraid they would be too much for me to handle because they weren’t at all. I shouldn’t have assumed they were just going to be one big behavior problem.
I know my job will not be perfect. I know I picked a field that may often come with frustration. But show me a job that is perfect, or won't be hard and frustrating at times. I don’t want people to keep second guessing my career choice. I chose it for a lot of reasons that I believe outweigh the reasons not to do it.
