By now, there probably aren’t many f*ckboys I haven’t crossed paths with: f*ckboys from class, f*ckboys who don’t initially seem like f*ckboys, f*ckboys who wanted to date but later decided not to, and f*ckboys who are very obviously f*ckboys but for some reason, you want them anyway. You name the type, and I’ve probably encountered at least one.
But even though f*ckboys suck, we still put up with them.
And while I’m incredibly guilty of complaining about f*ckboys, I recently realized that instead, I should be grateful for them because the lessons they’ve reinforced over the past three years have been invaluable.
(Note: I'm not saying you can't learn these lessons elsewhere. I'm merely suggesting that since f*ckboys are now a dime a dozen, you might as well reap some benefit of inevitable heartache.)
It's because of f*ckboys that I’ve been reassured that not everyone deserves another chance.
I’ve always been incredibly forgiving, and as a result, I dole out second chances quite often. Unfortunately, second chances usually become third, fourth, and fifth chances. There isn’t one excuse in the book that I haven’t used when it comes to explaining to friends why I’m taking back F*ckboy #3 for the tenth time.
If you’re like me, then realize you’re making excuses for these boys in hopes that they’ll magically change overnight. Then, understand that they won’t change—not because you didn’t try hard enough, but because they never wanted to change in the first place (no matter how often they claim otherwise).
Also realize that you’ll probably respect and care for them more than they respect and care for you.
Not everyone in life will treat you with equal respect, and that’s fine. But if one more person tells me that I signed up for poor treatment because I’m part of the hookup culture, I promise I'll scream. Basic human decency is not an outrageous request.
F*ckboy or not, I’m not asking you to make me the center of your world; I’m simply asking you to treat me with the same care and respect you present your friends.
But the most important thing to remember about f*ckboys is that you’re never the only girl.
Stop being naive and internalize this. If you’re not exclusive with someone, there’s likely someone else. Hell, even the committed ones can be sketchy these days. Be careful. There are amazing people out there, but if you’re f*cking with a f*ckboy, don’t be fooled.
For the past three years, I've been handed some of the sh*ttiest people. But to all the f*ckboys (past, present, and future): thank you. It’s because of you all that I’m stronger, smarter, and less tolerant of all of your bullsh*t.
Don’t get me wrong, I want you in my life for various reasons, and I'll likely still complain from time to time. But just know that girls are only becoming more well-versed in your games. So give it your best shot.
