Yes, It Is Possible To Be Genuinely Nice To Even Your Worst Enemy

Yes, It Is Possible To Be Genuinely Nice To Even Your Worst Enemy

There is a happy medium between being a cold bitch and being a fake bitch: being a nice bitch!

Watching a chick flick with my friends the other night—The Duff, highly recommend—I came to the realization that every chick flick, every Rom Com and many other genres in between are plagued by a similar character: the fake bitch. This character comes in no specific form (a snotty teenage girl, a flamboyantly stylish yuppie, the jock, you name it) yet they all portray this persona dubbed in capital letters: FAKE.

Cue the ridiculously large, toothy smile. The too-enthusiastic-to-be-real “O.M.Geeeeeee I missed you so much!!!” The oh-so-tender hug. The post interaction eye-roll. You get the picture. And if you don’t, watch Mean Girls and you will.

As the realization of this glamorizing of the “fake bitch” floated through my conscious, along came the question: “What’s the point?”

Don’t pull a Regina George and act like you’re innocent. We’ve all been found guilty of being that fake bitch, and I’m not saying you’re a bad person for it. My point is: it’s a waste of your fucking time.

The fact of the matter is you don’t have to be fake to be nice, period, end of story. I do not care how much you absolutely abhor a person, kindness is always possible. Yet this is where people get confused: kindness and fakeness are mutually exclusive.

Newsflash: if you’re faking being nice you’re not being nice, without question. Anyone with the most minute grasp of social cues can read fakeness like the bold headlines on a Cosmopolitan magazine. It’s obviously not genuine, thus neither party wins.

Then again, some will say: “Well I don’t like so-and-so, but I didn’t want to seem cold.” Then don’t! People seem utterly baffled by the fact there is a happy medium between being a cold bitch and being a fake bitch. That happy medium is being a nice bitch–SHOCKING, I know.

Truth: It’s rude to be dismissive or act openly displeased with someone’s presence. Also a truth: It’s rude to appear fake as “fakeness” is literally just passive aggressively saying “I don’t like you, and I don’t care.” Both extremes are equally rude, so why fall fate to either?

The fix: just be kind, genuinely, not fakely. It’s totally acceptable to not act like you're besties with that guy you barely know or that girl who used to make fun of you in high school. You never have to throw out an insincere compliment. It's never necessary to tell anyone how much you missed them if you actually loved every second spent not seeing their face. Yet, this is not to say you have to be mean in order to not be fake, don’t stoop to a lesser level. Even cordiality goes a long way, and voila! You are no longer deemed a bitch, fake or otherwise.

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10 Things Someone Who Grew Up In A Private School Knows

The 10 things that every private school-goer knows all too well.


1. Uniforms

Plaid. The one thing that every private school-goer knows all too well. It was made into jumpers, skirts, shorts, scouts, hair ties, basically anything you could imagine, the school plaid was made into. You had many different options on what to wear on a normal day, but you always dreaded dress uniform day because of skirts and ballet flats. But it made waking up late for school a whole lot easier.

2. New people were a big deal

New people weren't a big thing. Maybe one or two a year to a grade, but after freshman year no one new really showed up, making the new kid a big deal.

3. You've been to school with most of your class since Kindergarten

Most of your graduating class has been together since Kindergarten, maybe even preschool, if your school has it. They've become part of your family, and you can honestly say you've grown up with your best friends.

4. You've had the same teachers over and over

Having the same teacher two or three years in a row isn't a real surprise. They know what you are capable of and push you to do your best.

5. Everyone knows everybody. Especially everyone's business.

Your graduating class doesn't exceed 150. You know everyone in your grade and most likely everyone in the high school. Because of this, gossip spreads like wildfire. So everyone knows what's going on 10 minutes after it happens.

6. Your hair color was a big deal

If it's not a natural hair color, then forget about it. No dyeing your hair hot pink or blue or you could expect a phone call to your parents saying you have to get rid of it ASAP.

7. Your school isn't like "Gossip Girl"

There is no eating off campus for lunch or casually using your cell phone in class. Teachers are more strict and you can't skip class or just walk right off of campus.

8. Sports are a big deal

Your school is the best of the best at most sports. The teams normally go to the state championships. The rest of the school that doesn't play sports attends the games to cheer on the teams.

9. Boys had to be clean-shaven, and hair had to be cut

If you came to school and your hair was not cut or your beard was not shaved, you were written up and made to go in the bathroom and shave or have the head of discipline cut your hair. Basically, if you know you're getting written up for hair, it's best just to check out and go get a hair cut.

10. Free dress days were like a fashion show

Wearing a school uniform every day can really drive you mad. That free dress day once a month is what you lived for. It was basically a fashion show for everyone, except for those upperclassmen who were over everything and just wore sweat pants.

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An Open Letter To My Childhood Best Friend

To Molly Zucker, I hope this article makes everyone surrounding you hear your obnoxious, priceless laugh.


Dear childhood best friend,

When I look back on my childhood, there is only one person who reminds me of home: you. After moving out of state and time passing on, it's easy to forget where you came from and parts of your childhood. However, the minute I see your face and hear your goofy laugh, the feeling of home returns. You bring out the fun and young in me because let's be honest, you turned out to be the adventurous spontaneous one and I'm just a boring nerd in Organic Chemistry. No one can make my pure childhood laughs come out or make me feel as free-spirited and lively as much as you do.

Lexi Garber

We used to ride our bikes around town, eat salt and vinegar chips until our tongues burned, and do each other's makeup and nails. We would go to the mall and dress ourselves in this horrendous outfits, but ones that we actually thought were cute at the time (Why did you let me wear half of the stuff I did?) We wrote each other cards during Recess and talked about how much we would gossip on our Friday night sleepovers. I could recognize your cupcake vanilla perfume scent from a mile away, even from this day and when I do smell it, it brings back such a warm and comforting familiar feeling.

Lexi Garber

We would talk about what our future would be like, how fun high school would be and what it would be like if we went to the same college. I didn't know that I would move before all of that but little did I know we would remain best friends and talk every day still to this day. Although there are moments where it hurts me that I didn't get to watch you grow out of your crazy, middle school self and into this beautiful and amazing girl, I know one day we will be close in distance again. We still talk about our future like we know what's going to happen and hopefully, we will live together in NYC one day, like we've always talked about. Who knows where we will both end up, but no matter how far we are in distance, we will always be close at heart.

Lexi Garber

The best part of being long distance best friends is that when our other friends annoy us, we can randomly Facetime each other at any time for a quick laugh and a reminder of how sacred our special bond is. We get to plan trips to see each other and show each other what has changed in our lives, but there is one thing that will never change: our friendship. So here's to you being my maid of honor, crazy aunt for my future kids, my soulmate, best friend and partner in crime. You bring out the happiness and best in me and I will love you always and forever.


Your childhood best friend

Lexi Garber

Lexi Garber

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