The floor. The shower. The sink. The bed. EVERYTHING.

If these words brought a chill straight to your bones and made every hair stand on end, you're probably like me: you hate, HATE HATE hotels. If it's not MY bed in MY room in MY house, I can not be comfortable.

Unfortunately, however, I LOVE to travel. The hotel... it's inevitable.

And it just seems to get worse the longer you stay.

1. You open the door and your eyes are automatically drawn to every feature in the room that makes you uncomfortable.

Which bothers you more, the horrific green carpet or the beige wallpaper that's nauseously peeling off like a bad sunburn?

2. After that long drive/flight, you have to get ready for your event with the dreaded shower.

Is it possible that you feel less clean after a shower in a hotel than when you stepped in?

\

3. Somehow you survive the shower, so you move to the sink to brush your teeth... but why does the tap water taste like a lake?

You're already considering the antibiotics you're going to have to take to get what could be lurking in the water out of your system.

4. Don't. You. Dare. Don't touch the floor with your bare feet. Ever.

Get those socks on ASAP and don't take them off unless your life depends on it.

5. You reach into your bag for your hairbrush, only to realize you forgot it.

And now that you realize it, you also forgot your pajamas... And your phone charger... How far is home again?

6. You finally get to the bed. Ahh, time to sleep.

But wait. Didn't your best friend in third grade tell you that the hotel staff usually never washes the comforters on the beds? And what about bed bugs? Who knows what's in this pit of softness and filth.

7. You're hot, you're cold, you're burning up, you're freezing.

You've gone through more drastic temperature changes than the Midwest in the middle of March. When will you ever get comfortable?

8. You finally get comfortable, but it doesn't matter. You can't sleep anyways.

You toss and turn all night, and eventually decide you won't sleep until you get home.

9. The next day, you are way too tired to even function.

Due to the tossing and turning all night mixed with the constricting blanket trying to cure your hypothermia, your eyes never were shut for more than a few seconds. Now you have to deal with the aftermath.

10. All you can think of is how you would rather be home.

Every single moment of the day is filled with a siren that wails "I WANT TO GO HOME" in your head.

And finally... after what feels like centuries... you are home.

Ahhh.