I’ve been here in this strange beautiful place for almost 21 years now. All though boys have come and gone I’ve never actually loved any and been loved in return. Now before you start imagining some anti-social weirdo who's never truly lived, let me tell you that’s not me.

I’ve felt the rush of escaping Barcelona shores to float in deep places of the Mediterranean. I’ve danced on tables with new Australian friends in Santorini. I’ve skinny dipped with my best girlfriends in Islamorada while gossiping about our current boy obsessions. I’ve lost a friend to suicide and questioned my faith. I have built strong relationships with people and seen beauty in them that they have never seen themselves. I’ve also had awful, awkward moments with boys which involved candles and pillows catching on fire. I’ve fallen off a boat going over 30mph and learned lessons, such as never dance while the boat is in motion especially when you’re 5’9 and don’t truly know how to twerk.

So you can get that whole cat lady image out of your head now thank you very much. Or maybe you never had that image and that’s just the way society has made girls like me feel. Regardless over the years of being extremely patient for the ‘one’ while biding my time by dressing up and finessing drinks at the bar with no regrets. I’ve become stuck with the thought that maybe just maybe my expectations are too high. In a world full of technology and filters and edits has this created a false sense of reality? Hollywood fills our head with perfect boys who are heroic, funny, attractive, wealthy, and just the right about of kind. Is this an impossible shoe to fill? Are we just too picky?

These questions have become more frequent lately. So I decided to start trying to be less picky, let certain things slide, like maybe the weird arm tat, or a little lisp, the weird friends they have, the handholding on day two of getting to know someone, the bad breath, the weird outfits, the guy who doesn't understand personal space, the guys who self discloses about their past relationships way too soon, the guys who’s mom always cleaned up after them and obviously they never learned or cared, the guys who couldn’t carry on a conversation to save their life but was good at everything else... the list goes on.

Finally, I came to the conclusion that if you truly like someone or if there is the possibility of love, all those messy things you will deal with you maybe even might find cute (minus the bad breath.. Tic tac that ish). I guess what i’m saying is we all have these faults even though I have mine and am blind to some of them I know that someone will find that they add to the list of reasons you work for one another. I guess what i’m saying is I will never change myself or my expectations for another just like I wouldn’t want someone to change for me. So I will continue to live my life and be open but never too open to the faults of humans because I know someone with similar faults is waiting to love mine. If you are in a perfect little relationship and gained nothing from this article please refer back to paragraph two on keeping bedside candles away from your pillows. Lessons people lessons.