The 7 Stages Of Going Out In College, As Told By 'SpongeBob'
Start writing a post
Student Life

The 7 Stages Of Going Out In College, As Told By 'SpongeBob'

Who knew college girls everywhere could relate to a yellow sponge's feelings so well?

The 7 Stages Of Going Out In College, As Told By 'SpongeBob'

During welcome week of college, going out is a voluntary activity that everyone is happy to be participating in. There’s no classes, everyone’s meeting new people and having fun, and you have no school related responsibilities. However, it’s no secret that as the semester goes on and responsibilities set in, going out becomes a chore and even sometimes a drag. You have to be willing to commit yourself to spending the night away from your assignments, away from the Netflix series you’re currently hooked on, and away from the comfort of your own bed. This leaves college students, especially girls, uncommitted and overemotional when choosing how to spend their Friday evening.

Stage One: Refusal

Your roommate suggest that you leave Gossip Girl behind for the night and says that Chad from Sigma Apple Pie invited us to a yoga themed party that starts in a couple hours. You laugh in her face and immediately refuse this night of "fun" because you have more important things to do, like finish a whole season of Gossip Girl of course. Like SpongeBob here, the thought of going out and being surrounded with boys like Chad makes you sick.

Stage 2: Consideration

After some more details about who's going to the party and realizing you haven't left your room in a couple days, you begin to consider this offer from your roommate. Although still skeptical, you begin to imagine, for just a split second, that it actually could be fun to get out for a night with your best girlfriends.

Stage 3: Commitment

I guess Blair and Chuck can wait tonight, because your roommate has finally convinced you to adventure into the real world and now that you're committed to a night out, there's absolutely no going back. The operation to transform your whole look is in full effect, because after all you have been in sweats and a sweatshirt for the past week. You and your roommate now spend the next hour doing make up, perfecting your hair, and of course picking out the best yoga outfit.

Stage 4: Plans

OH NO. Chad from Sigma Apple Pie just canceled at the last minute. Shocker, right?! Everyone knows these boys aren't reliable. You and your roommate are stopped in your tracks, had just gotten ready, had already mentally prepared to spend the evening out, and now this irrelevant Chad seems to be ruining your night before it's even started. Being the strong women you are, you are now determined to not let that happen and any doubts you had about going out in the first place are gone. Knowing your plans will probably change about ten more times before the night is over anyway, you venture on out together determined and committed to this night of fun.

Stage 5: Party

You two beautiful souls finally stumble upon a party that looks worth entering. The DJ is playing your favorite music, you see some girls from class you know right when you walk in, and you start to finally enjoy yourself. The bartender, of course, gets you and your roommate a couple drinks, and you start to watch the guys around you play a game of beer pong while you begin to dance with your girls. Finally, your night has taken a turn for the better! Or, has it??

Stage 6: Denial

You knew this was a bad idea, you told yourself not to leave your room, you knew it wouldn't be worth it. Turns out a couple of your girlfriends have had a little too much to drink and are drawing attention to themselves at the party. Girl code clearly states that you and your roommate have to be the ones to intervene and get them out of there safely, so you sadly leave the party early with two stumbling girls who currently don't even know their first names and are in their own little world.

Stage 7: Refusal 2.0

Here we are back at refusal again. After one of your girlfriends throws up in the uber on the way home and the other one drunk calls her mom crying, you come to the conclusion, once again, that going out really can be the hardest chore you currently face as an adult. Although you and your roommate got to dance on a table for a total of thirty seconds, this adventure was not worth the hours of work you put into making this night successful and was definitely not worth missing the current drama that Blair and Chuck are dealing with on Gossip Girl. Exhausted, you return to your bed, hoping to never leave it again. Until the next Friday night rolls around, but this time Tyler from Baked Potato Pi texts you about the Hawaiian themed party his frat is having...

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Types of ice cream

Who doesn't love ice cream? People from all over the world enjoy the frozen dessert, but different countries have their own twists on the classic treat.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

100 Reasons to Choose Happiness

Happy Moments to Brighten Your Day!

A man with a white beard and mustache wearing a hat

As any other person on this planet, it sometimes can be hard to find the good in things. However, as I have always tried my hardest to find happiness in any and every moment and just generally always try to find the best in every situation, I have realized that your own happiness is much more important than people often think. Finding the good in any situation can help you to find happiness in some of the simplest and unexpected places.

Keep Reading...Show less

Remember The True Meaning of Christmas

“Where are you Christmas? Why can’t I find you?”

A painting of the virgin Mary, the baby Jesus, and the wise men

It’s everyone’s favorite time of year. Christmastime is a celebration, but have we forgotten what we are supposed to be celebrating? There is a reason the holiday is called Christmas. Not presentmas. Not Santamas. Not Swiftmas. Christmas.

boy standing in front of man wearing santa claus costume Photo by __ drz __ on Unsplash

What many people forget is that there is no Christmas without Christ. Not only is this a time to spend with your family and loved ones, it is a time to reflect on the blessings we have gotten from Jesus. After all, it is His birthday.

Keep Reading...Show less
Golden retriever sat on the sand with ocean in the background
Photo by Justin Aikin on Unsplash

Anyone who knows me knows how much I adore my dog. I am constantly talking about my love for her. I attribute many of my dog's amazing qualities to her breed. She is a purebred Golden Retriever, and because of this I am a self-proclaimed expert on why these are the best pets a family could have. Here are 11 reasons why Goldens are the undisputed best dog breed in the world.

Keep Reading...Show less

Boyfriend's Christmas Wishlist: 23 Best Gift Ideas for Her

Here are the gifts I would like to ask my boyfriend for to make this season unforgettable.

Young woman opening a Christmas gift

Recently, an article on Total Sorority Move called 23 Things My Boyfriend Better Not Get Me For Christmas, was going around on social media. I hope the author of this was kidding or using digital sarcasm, but I am still repulsed and shocked by the lack of appreciation throughout this article. I would like to represent the girlfriends out there who disagree with her standpoint -- the girlfriends who would be more than happy to receive any of these gifts from their boyfriends.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments