The 7 Stages Of Going Out In College, As Told By 'SpongeBob'
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Student Life

The 7 Stages Of Going Out In College, As Told By 'SpongeBob'

Who knew college girls everywhere could relate to a yellow sponge's feelings so well?

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The 7 Stages Of Going Out In College, As Told By 'SpongeBob'
Nickelodeon

During welcome week of college, going out is a voluntary activity that everyone is happy to be participating in. There’s no classes, everyone’s meeting new people and having fun, and you have no school related responsibilities. However, it’s no secret that as the semester goes on and responsibilities set in, going out becomes a chore and even sometimes a drag. You have to be willing to commit yourself to spending the night away from your assignments, away from the Netflix series you’re currently hooked on, and away from the comfort of your own bed. This leaves college students, especially girls, uncommitted and overemotional when choosing how to spend their Friday evening.

Stage One: Refusal

Your roommate suggest that you leave Gossip Girl behind for the night and says that Chad from Sigma Apple Pie invited us to a yoga themed party that starts in a couple hours. You laugh in her face and immediately refuse this night of "fun" because you have more important things to do, like finish a whole season of Gossip Girl of course. Like SpongeBob here, the thought of going out and being surrounded with boys like Chad makes you sick.

Stage 2: Consideration

After some more details about who's going to the party and realizing you haven't left your room in a couple days, you begin to consider this offer from your roommate. Although still skeptical, you begin to imagine, for just a split second, that it actually could be fun to get out for a night with your best girlfriends.

Stage 3: Commitment

I guess Blair and Chuck can wait tonight, because your roommate has finally convinced you to adventure into the real world and now that you're committed to a night out, there's absolutely no going back. The operation to transform your whole look is in full effect, because after all you have been in sweats and a sweatshirt for the past week. You and your roommate now spend the next hour doing make up, perfecting your hair, and of course picking out the best yoga outfit.

Stage 4: Plans

OH NO. Chad from Sigma Apple Pie just canceled at the last minute. Shocker, right?! Everyone knows these boys aren't reliable. You and your roommate are stopped in your tracks, had just gotten ready, had already mentally prepared to spend the evening out, and now this irrelevant Chad seems to be ruining your night before it's even started. Being the strong women you are, you are now determined to not let that happen and any doubts you had about going out in the first place are gone. Knowing your plans will probably change about ten more times before the night is over anyway, you venture on out together determined and committed to this night of fun.

Stage 5: Party

You two beautiful souls finally stumble upon a party that looks worth entering. The DJ is playing your favorite music, you see some girls from class you know right when you walk in, and you start to finally enjoy yourself. The bartender, of course, gets you and your roommate a couple drinks, and you start to watch the guys around you play a game of beer pong while you begin to dance with your girls. Finally, your night has taken a turn for the better! Or, has it??

Stage 6: Denial

You knew this was a bad idea, you told yourself not to leave your room, you knew it wouldn't be worth it. Turns out a couple of your girlfriends have had a little too much to drink and are drawing attention to themselves at the party. Girl code clearly states that you and your roommate have to be the ones to intervene and get them out of there safely, so you sadly leave the party early with two stumbling girls who currently don't even know their first names and are in their own little world.

Stage 7: Refusal 2.0

Here we are back at refusal again. After one of your girlfriends throws up in the uber on the way home and the other one drunk calls her mom crying, you come to the conclusion, once again, that going out really can be the hardest chore you currently face as an adult. Although you and your roommate got to dance on a table for a total of thirty seconds, this adventure was not worth the hours of work you put into making this night successful and was definitely not worth missing the current drama that Blair and Chuck are dealing with on Gossip Girl. Exhausted, you return to your bed, hoping to never leave it again. Until the next Friday night rolls around, but this time Tyler from Baked Potato Pi texts you about the Hawaiian themed party his frat is having...

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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