The 15 Stages Of Painting A Cooler

In recent times, it has become customary for a girl to paint a cooler for a frat boy if he asks her to his fraternity formal. Let me tell you, there's a lot more to it than just putting paint on a piece of plastic. If you're not careful, painting a cooler can consume your life. Here are the stages a girl may go through as she paints a cooler for her formal date.

1. The purchase

Large? Medium? Small? How much is he going to put in there?

2. The first avoidance period

Because who actually wants to sand a whole entire cooler?

3. The sanding

Okay, but his he really going to care if it's really smooth?

4. The design contemplation

And racking your brain trying to remember what sports teams he likes, what does for fun, where he's from, etc.

5. The final decision

Flags and sports team logos are the way to go.

6. The second avoidance period

Because tracing does not sound like fun.

7. The tracing

Yep. Tracing is not fun.

8. The arm pain

In fact, tracing is awkward because you must try and trace your designs without getting in the way of the projector. I didn't know I could trace upside down.

9. The painting

One coat will be enough, right?

10. And more painting

More like three, four, or five coats.

11. The third avoidance period

The painting took 5ever. I just want to sleep.

12. The sealing

But I must or else the paint will chip. Uggghhhhh.

13. The fourth avoidance period

I'll just let it sit in my dorm room for a couple of days because I'm tired of dealing with it.

14. The contemplation of what to put in it

What kind of beer does he like? I want something cheap but not too cheap...

15. The delivery

Here's your painted piece of plastic in exchange for a weekend out of town.