I am not a sorority girl. I said those words to countless people, including myself, more times than I could count during my first semester at UC Berkeley. During welcome week, girls in sororities and fellow floor mates of mine questioned whether or not I was rushing, and even when I told them that I wasn't, they still told me to give it a try. And even after rush was over, I was still told to "Give it a try next year!" But my decision was final; sororities just weren't for me.
And, as I thought at the time, why would I want to join one? I grew up in the Midwest. Many of my friends and family members went away to Big 10 or Southern schools with large, competitive Greek lives. While I never thought that sororities were bad — my older sister is in a sorority and I always loved visiting her house at college — I just conceded to the idea that I was not meant to be in one. After all, I couldn't craft, I couldn't sing, let alone remember an entire rush song, and the idea of sitting in a circle of catty girls bonding over a faux sense of sisterhood seemed juvenile and completely phony to me.
So there I was, midway through first semester of my freshman year at my dream college, when I started to realize my sudden lack of activities in life. Back in high school, I competed in sports, wrote articles for my paper, participated in musicals and had many more activities on my plate all while balancing schoolwork and a social life. I figured college would be the same; I would get involved in similar activities with similar people and that would give me purpose in college. But for me, that never happened. I struggled with finding activities that I loved. Whereas I had a whole high school full of friends to hang out with before, the immensity of a 35,000 person campus suddenly began to weigh on me when I realized that making good friends would take more than simply matching with a roommate on Facebook.
It was at this moment that I began to contemplate the idea of rushing. Even though I was only half-serious about the thought, I spoke with some floor mates of mine who were in sororities. We stayed up all night talking about the individual chapters, the girls involved, and my own personal feelings towards rushing. Finally, just before November began, I told myself I was going to go through spring rush.
For lack of a better phrase, the rest is history. I joined an amazing house at Cal and immediately clicked with girls. Even though I initially felt behind since I was one of the few girls who chose to rush in the spring instead of fall, everyone welcomed me into all their activities. I got a big (and a twin!), only making me feel further welcomed into the family of Alpha Phi. And even after being away from my sisters all summer, I immediately fell back into place with everyone during the fall rush process this year, and got another amazing pledge class to bond with.
The reason I write this article is to say that if you had asked me a year ago if I was a sorority girl, my answer wound have been a resounding no; the phrase itself had too many negative connotations behind it. But after almost a year of Greek life under my belt, I can say without doubt that I am a sorority girl. Because a sorority girl is not some vapid, image obsessed, future housewife obsessed with crafting and pastels.Â
A sorority girl exemplifies charity, as shown by our countless philanthropy events held over the year. A sorority girl is intelligent, just look at the average Greek GPA at Cal. A sorority girl is adventurous; she'll get her nails done and then go hiking up the fire trails 20 minutes after without a second thought. And a sorority girl can probably drink you under the table and party hours after you've passed out.
But most importantly, a sorority girl is a representation of family, an entire group of people who are there when you leave home for the first time and have no idea what to expect. They're here to laugh with you over last night's mistakes, to cry with you over an undeserving guy, to stay in with you when you have a massive midterm to study for or just to lay in bed with you and watch countless hours of Netflix.
Despite all the tests and classes I've taken at Berkeley, one of the most valuable things I've learned over the past year is that I am a sorority girl, and I'm damn proud of it.