A lot of the time we listen to music because we identify with the lyrics. Belting out Adele's Someone Like You or Destiny Child's Survivor (depending on your post-breakup state of mind) will do wonders for a broken heart. I Will Remember You by Sarah McLachlan can help get you through the death of a dearly beloved pet, and All Time Low by Jon Bellion is an excellent source of emotional support if you sleep through an exam, forget your mom's birthday and get into a car accident all on the same day. Certain music artists make you feel less alone because by listening to their songs you know that they understand the exact thing you are experiencing.

Sometimes lyrics hit so close to home I replay the song over and over again until my sister sends me passive aggressive texts to stop playing Akon on repeat. However, not all songs encapsulate my feelings as well as every song ever written by Akon.

The other day I was in my car listening to music and All Night Longer by Sammy Adams came on shuffle. When he got to the line “a couple rounds going down like water,” I was so completely taken aback that I nearly swerved off the road. Going down like water??? What on earth kind of alcoholic beverage is Sammy Adams consuming? I cannot even fathom drinking with that amount of ease- I wince at the smallest sip of anything containing even a trace of alcohol.

Then I got to thinking about other song lyrics that I in no way shape or form can relate to. So, as I tend to do, I made a list. This is the result:

1. "Are we human or are we dancer?"- Human, The Killers

In my 22 years of life, there has not once been even a fleeting moment in which I’ve entertained the possibility of being dancer rather than human. I have never and will never have that much faith in my dancing capabilities. I would attach a video of me dancing to prove to you what I mean but it would scar you for life and also destroy every ounce of dignity I still possess.

2. "It's the end of the world as we know it, and I feel fine" - It's the End of the World, R.E.M.

I'm not speaking from personal experience here, but I just don't think that this would be my reaction to the Apocalypse.

3. “Now I'm a fat house cat nursing my sore, blunt tongue; watching the warm poison rats crawl through the wide fence cracks.” - Flightless Bird, American Mouth, Iron & Wine

No part of this is something I can identify with.

4. "I love rock n' roll" - I Love Rock n' Roll, Joan Jett

I would definitely say that I appreciate rock n’ roll and recognize its advancement of free-thinking, rebellion, and individuality in our society but love is a strong word and I’m not sure if I’m ready for that type of commitment.

5. “We watched Titanic, and it didn't make us sad." - (If You're Wondering If I Want You To), Weezer

What is this even saying?

6. "Every breath you take and every move you make; every bond you break, every step you take, I'll be watching you." - Every Breath You Take, The Police

I like to think that I am at least reasonably sane and not a terrifying stalker.

7. “You can count on me to misbehave.” - Primadonna, Marina and the Diamonds

You absolutely cannot count on me for this. Misbehaving is not an adjective commonly used to describe me. Before the entrance to the library was made completely open, instead of just walking through the exit gate of the library like every single other person on campus, I used to scan in through the entrance turnstile. Every time.

8. “You can run, you can hide, but you can't escape my love.” - Escape, Enrique Iglesias

While I'm sure this is intended to come across as romantic, it leans more toward troubling. I'm fairly certain that if someone doesn't love me I will accept this fact and not chase them down to the ends of the earth against their will.

9. “I’m hittin' every, every green light” - I’m On A Roll, Stefano Langone

I’m sorry, but unless Stefano’s car is equipped with one of those devices that allow emergency vehicles to activate a green signal in the direction they are travelling, I’m calling bulls*** on this one. No one leads such a blessed life that they just happen to never have to stop at a traffic light.

10. "I'm up all night til the sun" - Get Lucky, Daft Punk

I'm just going to stop right there and not even get to the second part of this line. I’m staying up til three in the morning, tops. I have s*** to do tomorrow.

11. “I'd catch a grenade for you.” - Grenade, Bruno Mars

Until I am actually in a situation where someone is flinging a grenade at someone I love I suppose I can’t know for sure what my course of action would be. Regardless, that is a major thing to promise someone and should be carefully considered and not thrown around casually in a pop song.

12. “They ain't see me cause I pulled up on my other Benz, last week I was in my other other Benz." - Otis, Kanye West

I have a grand total of 0 Benz's. They would see me pull up in my Hybrid Toyota Highlander.