Some Customers Should Be Illegal | The Odyssey Online
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Some Customers Should Be Illegal

The retail slave will no longer stay silent.

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Some Customers Should Be Illegal
Samantha Lopez

Dear Retail Customer,

I very well know that everyone loves to shop! Myself included, as an avid *insert hip teen store here* shopper, enjoy the tingly feeling you get when you find that perfect top to wear on your date or the best concert shorts but, have you ever stopped to think about the mess you're leaving behind? Of course not!

You probably think, “I'm just one person, how big of a mess could I make?” Well with that mentality that many of us have, it's not just your mess, but hundreds of other people's mess as well. It really stacks up. Believe me!

I know that you might be in a rush or are tired from taking your kids to soccer or getting back from a party or something and want to go home quickly, but you don't need to try on the same pair of pants in every single different size! Shouldn't you already know that by now in this stage of your life? I mean, come on, people!

Also you don't need to put clothes on the hangers inside out or worse-- leave them thrown on the floor! I know what you may be thinking, “Someone will pick it up, it's their job,” and you're right. But it's also our jobs to scan, put out new merchandise, run around like a chicken without its head trying to help you ungrateful loons, vacuum, dust, pick up the most vile things you people leave on the floor, look up other clothes for other people, and so much more. We just ask for a slightly better hand from you, the customer, the person we devote our retail lives to.

And, if there's a rack to return your unwanted items, by all means-- use it. I guarantee a happier retail worker with iIntel's that they will gladly help you with whatever you need.

While we're on the subject of making the retail worker happy, we would all really appreciate it if you don't yell at us for not honoring your expired coupons. It's not up to us and to let you in on a little secret, we don't mind when you save money. We couldn't care less, because it's not our money so we aren't trying to gyp you out of a deal. We're just doing our jobs. Most of us really need the money.

Lastly, one of the most hated factors in retail is the customers that just won't leave when we're closing. First of all, why would you waltz right in when we're five minutes to close? What the heck can you possibly accomplish in five stinking minutes? You're just stressing us out and we will sure as heck still close the registers if you're trying to buy something past closing, so why would you even bother? You had all darn day to shop! Why now?! Why me?! Do you people think we don't have lives?! That we aren't tired and want to go home to eat or shower or rest or do anything. What if our favorite show is having their season finale? How could you do that to us?

All us retail slaves ask for is a little more respect. Thank you.

-The Retail Worker

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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