Over time, parenting has become a bit different. In the past, parents were attentive and watched over their kids as they grew. Today many parents seem to not care what their kids do or how they behave. Both parents may be working today, whereas, not all that long ago, there was a distinct breadwinner-homemaker family dynamic. The changes in how the household functions may or may not be contributing to how parents raise their kids. Before, the mother was the homemaker and child-rearer, while the father provided the income and doled out punishments to the kids. The saying moms sometimes use when the children are in trouble, ‘When your father gets home…’ comes to mind. Perhaps the changes in women being a part of the workforce has made children less receptive to learning and good behavior. Philip P. Cohen says in his book The Family: Diversity, Inequality, and Social Change, that there has been “a cultural pressure on women to devote more time, energy, and money to raising their children.” And that it is “ironic that this pressure seemed to be increasing as women seemed to have less time available for their children due to higher rates of employment as well as more divorce and single parenthood.”

Drifting from the breadwinner-homemaker family dynamic influenced the changes in parenting by making the mother less of an immediate issuer of punishment to misbehaving children as she may not have been home. Women entering the workforce impacted parenting because many children then had two working parents and were left in the care of childcare facilities or family members, who would have parented differently.

These changes to parenting have made many kids able to get away with more inappropriate behavior. It has led to modern families parenting by television or electronics; they put their little ones in front of the device and walk away, letting the electronics teach and parent their child for them. I believe this influences education as well, by many children lacking the discipline necessary when first starting school. A lot more kids have become troublesome because they are not being reprimanded at home. This also influences employment because a lot of those mothers, who entered the workforce, will leave again to go back to caring for the children. Many mothers take time off when the kids are born and do not re-enter the workforce until the child is school age. On the other hand, this does not impact healthcare as much. Yes, due to lack of proper parenting, some kids may end up using healthcare to treat injuries that would not have happened if the parents were more attentive, but not all injuries to kids can be blamed on the parent(s).

Sociological Perspectives

1) Conflict Perspective

Cohen cites Conflict Perspective as “the view that opposition and conflict define a given society and are necessary for social evolution.” To view parenting styles through this lens, one would assume that the children’s behavior is the conflict and the parental discipline is the opposition. In this way, the parenting all comes down to action and reaction within the family dynamic. Cohen says, “expressing conflict over differences is often the best way to arrive at positive changes in families, organizations, and society at large.” So, basically, people should fight to solve conflict for a happier future. In a family dynamic, this means children rebel and parents are required to provide punishment.

2) Structural Functionalism Perspective

Cohen cites Structural Functionalism Perspective as “the premise that consensus and harmony form the basis of society.” To view parenting through this lens, one would have to believe that children always do what they are told and never receive punishment for misbehavior. It may mean that instead of punishments when children in the family do wrong, they are sat down and taught why what they did was incorrect and how to correct the behavior in the future. All of this would be done with no negativity from the parents.

3) Symbolic Interactionism Perspective

Cohen cites Symbolic Interactionism Perspective as “the ability to see themselves through the eyes of others and to enact social roles based on others’ expectations.” To view parenting through this lens, one must see how parenting and being a child truly are. Imagine what the child sees when they are punished. Do they see an angry, yelling parent or a calm in control adult? Imagine what the parent sees when they dole out punishment. A child aware of wrongdoings and consequences or a child who doesn’t care what they did wrong? Cohen also says, this is a great sociological lens to study families with due to the “intrapersonal level as people assess the effects of their actions on others.” This means parents try and see how the child feels first before punishing them. If the child has acted out for a reason, the behavior may be handled without any punishment to the child.

Today, many parents are following the conflict perspective when parenting their children. I cannot describe how many times I see parents not parenting and just letting their kids go. A mom screaming in the grocery store because her kids wants everything, a dad telling his son to stop being stupid in the restaurant because he is playing with his food, and so much more! Perhaps a change in the way we parent would benefit both the parents and the children, no matter what. For example, my daughter is rarely punished in the sense of being spanked, placed in the corner, etc. Her punishments are simple and typically involve loss of privileges, like going out to eat or a trip to the movies. She has learned over time that wrongdoings and unruly behavior lead to loss of good things or fun trips. This means we follow the pattern of the structural functionalism theory in that we employ harmony within the family dynamic and if the child breaks the harmony with misbehavior, the whole family is impacted by the punishment.

A parent should be attentive, aware, and above all, honest with their children, particularly with punishments. Parents should also show their kids true love because above all else...

Your child needs to know they are the most important thing in your world!