To The Socially Awkward Kids Who Would Rather Stay In Bed Than Go To A Party

To The Socially Awkward Kids Who Would Rather Stay In Bed Than Go To A Party

Please don't make me go to social events and expect me to socialize well.

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Dear Everyone,

Please don't think I am weird when I silently sit and wait for a conversation to start up. If I tried to start up the conversation my anxiety would skyrocket. Please don't give me weird looks if I quietly listen in on your loud conversations as a way to feel less awkward. Please don't get mad when I don't know what to say in response to your question. Please don't get upset when I can't talk to you about my feelings. Please don't get mad when I tell you to make all the decisions.

It's not that I want you to make all the decisions, it's just that I really have no preference and I don't want you to settle for my random draw of the hat. Please remember that your reaction fuels the fear of not being normal.

Dear Mom and Dad,

Please don't make me talk to the pizza guy on the phone, it stresses me out. I know they won't judge me, but I still have trouble doing it. Please just let my incorrect dinner order slide, speaking to the waitstaff about it gives me anxiety. I don't want to make them mad or think of me as picky. Please don't make me go to social events and expect me to socialize well. I don't do well in areas of communicating with strangers. Please don't question why I'd rather stay in bed in my room than make plans with new people. I prefer a routine.

Dear Future Lovers,

Please be patient with me, I don't know what to do. I'm not well experienced and need big hints to fully understand what you want. Please be slow with me, going too fast freaks me out. Just ask and I'll tell you. Please be open and honest with me, I respond better to direct questions. If you want to know something ask, I have no problem opening up when I know what to talk about.

Please don't be afraid to ask me anything. I am more comfortable when you start the talking. Please just wait for my walls to come down, I will open up and blossom into the fun weirdo Just give me time. Please don't hate me when I can't tell you about my feelings, I want to, I just don't know how to form the words.

Dear All,

You want answers and I can give you some. I am socially awkward and I know that. I would rather stay in my room, in my bed, than go out and meet new people. I have to prepare myself when I order food over the phone because I'm afraid I won't understand them. When restaurants get my order wrong, I eat it anyway rather than have them fix it. When I go out with friends I'm the most easygoing person ever. You want to go here? Okay. You want that kind of food? Done. You want me to pick? Um, well, I don't know. I sit in my room and read and watch TV while munching on snacks and wait for others to make the first move.

I keep to myself when I don't know what to do. I don't know how to start difficult conversations and I don't know what to say. I don't know how to express my emotions around other people, my family included. I learned that writing is my way of expression. Doing things that aren't in my comfort zone gives me anxiety and discomfort to the point where I isolate myself in a room of people. So please, a message to all, understand that we socially awkward few are trying our best. We just need to find a way to connect to you.

Yes, I am socially awkward, but I am still me, it just takes a little time and effort to find that out.

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You May Have Worn The Prom Dress With Him, But I Get To Wear The Wedding Dress

You had him in high school, but I get him for the rest of my life.
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High school seems like the best time of your life when you are in it. You think that all of your friends will be with you until the end, and that you will end up with whoever you are dating your senior year. For very few, that might just be the case. For all others, that is far from true.

You thought that you would marry your boyfriend and you thought that everything would work out how you had always imagined. I don't blame you though. He's great. You wanted everything with him, but you were just not right for him.

I wish I could say that I am sorry it didn't work out for you, but I can't. I can't because he is mine now, and I get to cherish him forever. You didn't do that right, and you were not meant to be together. You will find someone too, but I am happy that you were not the one for him.

Sometimes I have issues with jealousy, and I hate that you got all of the high school stuff with him. You got to go to games and support him. It kills me that I couldn't be there for him because I know I would have actually been there wholeheartedly. I would have done it out of love, not as a popularity appearance.

I hate that you got to go to all of the school dances with him. He got to see you all dressed up and probably told you how great you looked. I'm sure you did look great. Prom dresses were always fun to pick out and so colorful. It was exciting to match colors with your date. I am sure you had fun choosing his matching tux to your dress.

I find myself getting jealous, but then I stop. I am getting to match his tux with our wedding colors. I got to go dress shopping in a sea of white, and he doesn't get to know one detail about that dress yet. He will get to see me walk down the aisle and then every day forever. I get to love him forever.

I try to not get jealous of all of the things you got with him because it is all in the past. You had your time, and now I get the wedding. You got to dress up in high school, but I get to dress up for my wedding with him. He may have put a corsage on your wrist, but he will be putting the wedding ring on my finger.

Cover Image Credit: Jessy Scott

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I Expected It To Have It All Together By 22 And I'm Still Far From That

What we expected and what reality actually is, are two completely different things...

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Oh our 20s, how we expected them to be so different. We expected to graduate college at 22, have a career by 23, be engaged by 24, married with a house by 25, kids by 26-28, vacationing with the family by 30, and retired by 60. We expected college to be parties and cute boys/girls. Instead, we got late nights of studying and crying after a job that barely pays for our car, food, dorm, and textbooks. We get no social life and if we do our grades suffer for it.

Our 20s were expected to be all fun but all we got were struggles and stress. I mean I don't know about you but I expected, to have it all together and I'm nearly 23 and far from it. I had all the scholarships and great grades, and I still don't have any type of degree.

Reality hits after 18. Most of us don't have the help of mom and dad anymore. We have to find our way and make a path for ourselves. Sometimes our dreams and goals have to be put on hold for that. The 20s isn't fun. It's about discovering who you are, who you want to be, and where you want to go. Some of us serve our country, some become incarcerated, some of us parents, some teachers, others cops, others travel or study abroad, some dead, some ill, other managers, others homeless, some still living home, and some even addicts.

The weird thing about your 20s is everyone is doing something different, but yet everyone is confused and comparing themselves to others. People feel if they're not doing what others are doing, in their age group then they have failed themselves. What people forget is that with life comes obstacles and sacrifice and everyone's life and situations are different. You are where you need to be right now, for you, and I think that's something to remember in your 20s.

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Another thing about your 20's is you're free to think for yourself now. No more having to follow a religion you dislike or hold back from things you love. The world is literally yours to discover and learn from. Possibilities are endless! I think your 20's are the years you create yourself to the best version of you and build the foundation for your future. Just remember, we all build at our own pace.

Signed,

The lost 22-year old that believes in you

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