There’s no doubt that social media is an important aspect of many people’s lives these days. Whether we like to admit it or not, we are a generation that is obsessed with creating the illusion that we have a perfect life on social media. We take countless photos trying to get that perfect shot, spend time editing our photos to cover up flaws, stress over thinking of a clever caption, and waste time stalking other popular “Instagram celebrities” we don’t even know personally, idolizing them and believing that their life is as perfect as they make it look.

Let me say right from the start that I am not against social media altogether. I spend my fair share of time browsing through Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, Pinterest, Reddit, etc. and definitely post about my own life often. I like social media and think a lot of times it is used positively and enjoyably. However, I've also witnessed a fair share of ugly that has come out of it. I've heard myself and my peers talk about others on social media, defining them as a person by their numbers of likes, followers, and comments. "He only got 6 likes on that post, how embarrassing," "She has so many followers! I'm so jealous," "Her selfie has over 100 likes!" Taking a step back, it seems so silly that we do this and allow ourselves to judge someone's character based on an Instagram photo when there are so many more interesting and unique attributes about them.

Last week, I kept seeing posts crowding my news feed about a young girl named Essena, so I decided to look into it and think the message she's trying to send is important and should be shared.

Essena O’Neill, a regular 19-year-old girl from Australia, had over a 900,000 followers on social media, racked up tens of thousands of likes/comments on each photo, and even made her income off her posts. Last week, she boldly made the decision to quit social media and instead use her popularity as a platform to bring attention to the multiple issues social media causes.

O’Neill had over 570,000 followers on Instagram, 250,000 followers on both YouTube and Tumblr, and 60,000 average views on Snapchat. She posted everything from selfies, outfit posts, and fitness inspiration photos. Although she is just a regular girl with an Instagram, other regular people look up to her and follow her life based on how she presents it on social media.

Last week, she made the decision to delete 2000 photos, rename her account to “Social Media Is Not Real Life,” and changed the captions on remaining photos exploiting the sad truth behind each shot. O’Neill discusses how she got paid hundreds to thousands of dollars by brands to post photos with their product, how many tries it took to get a shot she was happy with, and all the pressure she felt to look and be perfect, many times stating that her photos are "not real."

“I’ve spent majority of my teenage life being addicted to social media, social approval, and social status and my physical appearance. [Social media] is contrived images and edited clips ranked against each other. It’s a system based on social approval, likes, validation, in views, success in followers. It’s perfectly orchestrated self-absorbed judgement.”

Growing up, Essena always wanted to be popular on social media, saying she thought not having a lot of followers made her feel "like nothing" and unimportant. Once she gained a lot of popularity, people started treating her and speaking about her differently because she has this following, and she didn't want to feel like she's more important than anyone else simply because she has a lot of followers. "It doesn't make me any different, if anything it makes me incredibly more insecure about what people think of me."

These claims are unsurprising considering how we as a society have made this idea of an “Instagram Model” become an actual profession. There are countless popular Instagram accounts with owners making thousands of dollars just for a few months of work. Why? Because our generation has grown completely obsessed with social media and how to present ourselves online and the “numbers” that come out of it. We edit our photos like crazy to try making ourselves seem more attractive, throw on clothes we would never actually wear outside the house just for a photo, and over-sexualize our bodies, all in pursuit of a higher number of likes and followers.

“When you let yourself be defined by numbers, you let yourself be defined by something that is not pure, that is not real, and that is not love.”

I believe this social media obsession derives from our natural human wanting to be liked, desired, and appreciated. We present ourselves in the way we want others to see us, hoping for more likes and followers to make ourselves seem validated. We’ve become unconsciously consumed in this fake realm of feeling like we need social approval, mistaking it for being real life approval.

Essena has recently started a new platform of her own called Let's Be Game Changers. She wants to use this platform to "promote real people making real change in society." There, O'Neill has been posting "game changing stuff" such as documentaries, TED talks, good books and music, art and quotes, etc., saying they are things she believes are worth talking about.

The truth is, this social media world is not real life, and that’s the main message Essena O’Neill was trying to prove. Just because you have thousands of followers doesn’t mean you have thousands of loyal friends who would go out of their way for you. Just because your selfie didn’t get as many likes as you wanted doesn’t mean you’re unattractive and unloved. Just because someone has more followers than you does not mean that they are a better or more valuable person than you. Don’t allow social media to be your main façade of happiness and self-worth. Start focusing more on real life interactions and building real relationships that mean more than a follower that likes everything you post. Social media is fun and enjoyable, but it should in no way dictate our lives and give others a false understanding of who we are as a person.

“I can’t tell you how free I feel without social media. Never again will I let a number define me. It suffocated me. I know you didn’t come into this world just wanting to fit in and get by. You are reading this now because you are a game changer, you might not know your power yet I am just finding mine, but man… when you do… far out you’ll go crazy. It’ll be brilliant. You’ll be brilliant.” -Essena O'Neill

Hear more of her powerful message here: