So God Gave Me A Daughter
Start writing a post

So God Gave Me A Daughter

I've questioned why God would take someone so dear and I have certainly skipped a few Sundays of church with the thought that it was fine, because God has taken so much from me.

So God Gave Me A Daughter
kdb photography

As I was driving home the other day, my mind went over and over all of the bad situations that have been happening in my life. I immediately wanted to pick up the phone and call my mom. The problem is every time I go to pick up my phone I remember I can't. I don't have that privilege anymore. It isn't a God given right to have your parents and I am slowly realizing that.

My mind wandered to what my mom must be doing and how she must be rejoicing with her loved ones there and then I heard it. The sweetest little laugh coming from the backseat. I'm not sure why or what happened, but in that moment it gave me pure joy. I remembered leading my mom back to church and how I rarely let her miss a church service when I was younger, sick or not.

After hearing a John Michael Montgomery song at the time that talked about a little girl seeing Jesus I wondered who he was and being the curious little rascal I was at the time, I didn't stop until I found out. I overheard my mom telling my dad. "That baby wants to go to church and I'm taking her." I got closer and closer to the Lord and I was saved at 8 years old. I found my best friend, my keeper, my refuge.

The problem is I've been resentful. I've questioned why God would take someone so dear and I have certainly skipped a few Sundays of church with the thought that it was fine, because God has taken so much from me. Don't get me wrong, I am blessed, but I'm also a little rebellious and so is my sweet girl. I have spent entire days exhausted and wondering how in the world that I do it, but then I remember God gave me my own little example of myself to show me lessons I need to learn on occasion.

It might sound like I am rambling, but hear me out. That same night I was in the car I thought about those church rides with my mom and the laughs. Memories of her bringing me little snack cakes after choir practice came to mind and then I heard my sweet girl laugh. I can't tell you how many occasions I felt like giving it all up. I always knew I would be lost without my mom and I know where she is and that she is happy, but at times I am simply selfish.

I thought about Genesis and how God made the world. How he created life, light, and the universe. I thought about how all of it was thought about before hand and carefully planned out. I realized I have felt guilty for having a baby while others can't and I have felt overwhelmed at times dealing with a little version of myself.

You see, it is my belief that God knew exactly what he was doing when he made me a mom. I think he thought about it and he said well school can wait a little while, because I am going to give her something she really needs. He knew I would be lost without my sweet mother, so he gave me the right to become one myself. I believe that God said she needs someone to ride to church and share laughs with.

I think that while we might not be as important as the world and the making of the universe, God saw it fit to make life a little more bearable when I feel like giving up on it. He looked down at my life and he saw something missing. Just like when he made the universe, he made something special to me. So God gave me a daughter.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Is Meaningful Casual Sex A Paradox?

Why noncommittal sex is more complicated than we'd like to think.


I lost my virginity to a graduate student from Los Angeles. We’d met at a rundown cafe whose Yelp page complained of an alleged rat infestation. His name was Ken and he was 25. What drew me to him was the peculiar way his mouth was perpetually fixed into a sideways, half-moon shape that was like a smirk but without any trace of smugness. But the two most striking parts of Ken by far were the dinner plate roundness of his face and his small, expressionless teddy bear eyes. Of the things that mattered to him, there was his best friend, a college dropout who sold computer parts in Toronto, and sex.

Keep Reading... Show less

A Conversation About Sex

"Sex is a part of nature. I go along with nature." - Marilyn Monroe

Thinking Beyond Barriers

There it is. Even though I'm not around you, I can feel it. Was there a flutter of embarrassment in your mind when you saw the word sex in this article’s title? Did you look over your shoulder to ensure nobody was around before you began to read this?

Keep Reading... Show less

13 Signs You Are A True Cancer Of The Zodiac

Calling all babies born June 21st - July 22nd!

My Astral Life

I'm the first to admit that I am one of THOSE people who uses their zodiac sign as a description of themselves. I realize not everyone believes in astrology-related anything, and there are plenty of people who don't fit their signs. However, I'm one of the people who truly fits their sign to a tee. I'm a Cancer, a Crab, a Moon Child. It's currently our season fellow Crabs! So without further ado, here are all of the signs that you're a Cancer.

Keep Reading... Show less

The Blessing of Lacking Sex Appeal

To all the fellow non "it" girls out there


Lacking sex appeal is not a desirable thing. It makes you fee not ugly, but wrong. Not having charisma is not a life goal. It doesn't make you fee friendless, but isolated. Not being the "it" girl happens, and tonight (and every nigh prior to this)

Keep Reading... Show less

Confessions From the Single Friend of the Group

It is truly the worst place to be

Confessions From the Single Friend of the Group

Look. If you are anything like me, complaining about being single is such a hard thing to because you are genuinely happy for your friends, but as they continue to be happy in their relationships, the ever crushing weight of being the single friends can become overwhelming. For context, my primary friend group consists of four people. We are all roommates and it is a great time here. All three of my roommates have boyfriends/girlfriends, which makes our friend group of four quickly jump to seven, and it is wonderful! I love my roommates so much and I love their S.O's, but no matter how much I love them I always get extremely jealous and sad. The sad thing is that the only part that ever truly ends up bugging me is that since I am single, they are my go-to top priorities and it has been really hard to watch myself slip from the top of their go-to's to not being their go to when they feel the weight of the world. What makes it harder is that expressing that I feel alone and unwanted makes me sound jealous and like I don't want my friends to hangout with their people. I get it. I do. But there are just days I want to be someone's first pick and I'm not.

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments