Humans don't think too much about slugs. With so much incendiary conversation in 2016, talk about slugs has undoubtedly fallen to the wayside. Bound up in our own political turmoil, we've given very little thought to slugkind. What kind of things are they up to? What projects are they working on? What mysterious corners of the psyche have they unfolded? Things of this nature.

Meanwhile, the slugs have been hard at work. Over the year, their creative output has blossomed. In the scope of visual arts alone they have evolved from obtuse expressions drawn in their slimy wake, to some pretty awful pipe-cleaner creations, to some pretty respectable fresco's, jumping quickly to works that eclipse the Sistine Chapel, all the way to something which can only be described in the human tongue as "Slugourney Weaver."

Crazy, right? This "photo" is actually an intricate mural of actress Sigourney Weaver made with only glitter and slug goo.

Turns out that slugs are wicked deep and totally in touch with their feelings - so much so, that right now they're on the cusp of a major creative renaissance. While humankind continues to entrench itself deeper in civil debate, slugkind has oozily locomoted to brave new horizons in arts and culture.

This sort of news definitely comes as a shock to most of us. It's like finding out that the silent kid in class you never paid any mind to turned out to be a creative genius. It certainly stings a bit. There's a sense of betrayal. How could you, slugs? Why can't you be the dumb slugs we thought you were? Please just stay dumb you silly snot worms.

But stay dumb they haven't. Probing fearlessly and perceptively into their conscious they have surpassed all art created and conceived by humankind. Slug-chef's have pioneered a kind of food that keeps evolving its intricate plating as it's digested by the slugs, showing meaningful messages through their semi-translucent skin. Slug-actors have taken to the slug-streets, performing original and biting guerrilla theatre to rally their slug-peers to the most prominent political slug-issues. Slug-fashion designers have released a new kind of sock that is either placed over the head or the genitals or both and are reportedly both extremely fashionable and comfy.

Slug-dance, slug-punk, slug-poetry, slug-resorts, slug-gardens, slug-fancy-dinner-parties-you-and-your-dumb-bipedal-friends-definitely-aren't-invited-to. Slug-Yuletide balls, slug-horse races, slug-beauty parlors, avant-slug-garde, slug-balloons, slug-florists, slug-healthcare, slug-affordable higher eductaion...the slugs have definitely won.

Desperate, human people have taken to city parks, naked, vasolined, and ready to beg for acceptance into the slugs mired paradise. If you or a loved one are a human person, it is highly recommended you follow suit and accept our gracious and superior slug overlords. Their president elect doesn't tweet like a slug-child.