How to Be Single

How to Be Single

The most commonly hated season of life is actually the sweetest.
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Everyone is single at some point in their life. Maybe you were only single until you met your future husband at 16. Maybe you're 27 and at the most lonely, "bachelorette" season of your life. No matter what the case, we've all been single. And as I've talked to more and more single people and have experienced a longer and longer season of singleness myself, I've started to realize that it's rare to find someone content in their singleness. It makes sense though, right? We all want to be in love. We all want someone who wants us back. We all desire a companion to "do life" with. The Lord made us to be in relationship with one another! However, we tend to overlook the importance of the single seasons of our lives.

This weekend, I was shown an illustration of a child going to his father and holding his hand. The father assumes the child wants to be with him and spend time with him, but instead, the child asks his father to get his favorite toy for him from the top shelf. The boy, in a sense, is using his father to get something he wants, but all the father wants is to be with his son and spend time with him. I find myself doing that sometimes with the Lord. I know that giving him my fear of singleness and my desire to be in a relationship will ultimately lead to Him providing me the perfect man. However, I'm starting to wonder if I am giving those things to the Lord because I want to spend more time with him or because I know I'll get the right man out of it?

How selfish of me. How awful is it of me to use my Heavenly Father that way. And I'm sure you've done it too. You pray to the Lord to make you content in your singleness and to teach you patience, but do you really mean it? Do you really want to be content in His love or are you just saying that because "it's how you get a boyfriend?"

I know, it's harsh. But what I want you (and myself) to realize is that being single is a GIFT. Paul literally says in 1 Corinthian 7 that the Lord gives us single seasons in our life as a GIFT. And you know what? It's a gift that we often refuse; a gift that we don't even want. But do you realize that the Lord has our best interests in mind? Do you realize that He knows what's ultimately best for our lives? If this is the kind of gift He wants to give us, why are we not excitedly receiving it?

When I hear that this is a gift He's giving me, one question comes to mind: why? Why, God, are you giving me this "gift" if You know I just want to love someone so, so badly. Why are you wishing for me to be content and happy and joyful in this season of life when you know the desire of my heart is to be in a relationship?

In 1 Corinthians 7:35, Paul says, "I am saying this for your own good, not to restrict you, but that you may live in a right way in undivided devotion to the Lord."

Breakaway Ministries did a series on relationships, and one of the messages was titled, "The Gift of Singleness." The speaker talks about basically everything I'm saying, and He stresses how important it is to focus on the Lord and to form a relationship with Him that is free from distractions. At one point in the message, the speaker says, "There's a lot of hurt when you look for a prince or a princess to do what only your King can do."

His plan for us is FAR greater than we can expect. And in this time where we have no distractions, why aren't we putting all of our attention on Him? Why are we looking for satisfaction and love and assurance from earthly beings when HE is the sole provider of eternal fulfillment?

Y'all, I don't know about you, but for me, I can't imagine anything better than getting to spend more and more time with the Lord. Nothing is better than having the opportunity to be selfish about my quiet time. In this season of no distractions and no commitments, we have the ability to know the Lord deeper, wider, and fuller than we ever will be able to in this lifetime.

So instead of using the Lord to get to the toy at the top of the shelf, just be with Him. Just spend time with Him and give Him all of your anxieties and worries when it comes to relationships. Soak up this distraction-free, beautiful time with Him, and form a relationship with Him that will never waiver. His plan for your life is incredible. The husband or wife he has waiting for you is so much more wonderful and perfect for you than you can ever imagine. But until that desire of yours is fulfilled, bask in this intimate time with the Lord. He is offering you this amazing gift, but will you receive it?

Cover Image Credit: Meagan Hobbs

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It's Time To Thank Your First Roommate

Not the horror story kind of roommate, but the one that was truly awesome.
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Nostalgic feelings have recently caused me to reflect back on my freshman year of college. No other year of my life has been filled with more ups and downs, and highs and lows, than freshman year. Throughout all of the madness, one factor remained constant: my roommate. It is time to thank her for everything. These are only a few of the many reasons to do so, and this goes for roommates everywhere.

You have been through all the college "firsts" together.

If you think about it, your roommate was there through all of your first college experiences. The first day of orientation, wishing you luck on the first days of classes, the first night out, etc. That is something that can never be changed. You will always look back and think, "I remember my first day of college with ____."

You were even each other's first real college friend.

You were even each other's first real college friend.

Months before move-in day, you were already planning out what freshman year would be like. Whether you previously knew each other, met on Facebook, or arranged to meet in person before making any decisions, you made your first real college friend during that process.

SEE ALSO: 18 Signs You're A Little Too Comfortable With Your Best Friends

The transition from high school to college is not easy, but somehow you made it out on the other side.

It is no secret that transitioning from high school to college is difficult. No matter how excited you were to get away from home, reality hit at some point. Although some people are better at adjusting than others, at the times when you were not, your roommate was there to listen. You helped each other out, and made it through together.

Late night talks were never more real.

Remember the first week when we stayed up talking until 2:00 a.m. every night? Late night talks will never be more real than they were freshman year. There was so much to plan for, figure out, and hope for. Your roommate talked, listened, laughed, and cried right there with you until one of you stopped responding because sleep took over.

You saw each other at your absolute lowest.

It was difficult being away from home. It hurt watching relationships end and losing touch with your hometown friends. It was stressful trying to get in the swing of college level classes. Despite all of the above, your roommate saw, listened, and strengthened you.

...but you also saw each other during your highest highs.

After seeing each other during the lows, seeing each other during the highs was such a great feeling. Getting involved on campus, making new friends, and succeeding in classes are only a few of the many ways you have watched each other grow.

There was so much time to bond before the stresses of college would later take over.

Freshman year was not "easy," but looking back on it, it was more manageable than you thought at the time. College only gets busier the more the years go on, which means less free time. Freshman year you went to lunch, dinner, the gym, class, events, and everything else possible together. You had the chance to be each other's go-to before it got tough.

No matter what, you always bounced back to being inseparable.

Phases of not talking or seeing each other because of business and stress would come and go. Even though you physically grew apart, you did not grow apart as friends. When one of you was in a funk, as soon as it was over, you bounced right back. You and your freshman roommate were inseparable.

The "remember that one time, freshman year..." stories never end.

Looking back on freshman year together is one of my favorite times. There are so many stories you have made, which at the time seemed so small, that bring the biggest laughs today. You will always have those stories to share together.

SEE ALSO: 15 Things You Say To Your Roommates Before Going Out

The unspoken rule that no matter how far apart you grow, you are always there for each other.

It is sad to look back and realize everything that has changed since your freshman year days. You started college with a clean slate, and all you really had was each other. Even though you went separate ways, there is an unspoken rule that you are still always there for each other.

Your old dorm room is now filled with two freshmen trying to make it through their first year. They will never know all the memories that you made in that room, and how it used to be your home. You can only hope that they will have the relationship you had together to reflect on in the years to come.


Cover Image Credit: Katie Ward

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Short Stories On Odyssey: Roses

What's worth more than red roses?

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Five years old and a bouquet of roses rested in her hands. The audience-- clapped away her performance, giving her a standing ovation. She's smiling then because everything made sense, her happiness as bright as the roses she held in her hands.

Fifteen now, and a pile of papers rested on her desk. The teachers all smiled when she walked down the aisle and gave them her presentation. She was content then but oh so stressed, but her parents happy she had an A as a grade, not red on her chest.

Eighteen now and a trail of tears followed her to the door. Partying, and doing some wild things, she just didn't know who she was. She's crying now, doesn't know anymore, slamming her fists into walls, pricking her fingers on roses' thorns.

Twenty-one and a bundle of bills were grasped in her hands. All the men-- clapped and roared as she sold her soul, to the pole, for a dance. She's frowning now because everything went wrong, but she has to stay strong, for rich green money, is worth more than red roses.

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