April 10th is National Sibling Day--a time to celebrate brothers, sisters, and step-siblings everywhere. Whether we agree or disagree, fight each other, or fight others together, we’ll always be connected to our siblings--not only by genetics and familial ties, but by the history we share.

My younger brother and I fought a ton as kids, mostly because we wanted the same thing at the same time. This drove my relatives crazy, as we would disrupt family gatherings by yelling and occasionally pummeling each other. As adults are disposed to do, they fell on the common cliche: “You fight now, but you’ll be best friends when you’re older. Just look at my sister/brother and I!” And, as kids are inclined to do, my brother and I just stuck out our tongues, laughed, and resumed our forceful screeching.

I hate to admit it, but they were (partially) right. My brother and I are now good friends. It didn’t happen overnight, or as quickly as our parents would have liked, but we don’t fight as much as we used to. Sure, we disagree, but it’s nowhere near the volume as of years past.

We became closer when I was in high school; we were both more mature and had drastically different interests and hobbies. My senior year, especially, was when we bonded. Most of my friends had graduated and I spent a lot of time with my family as a result. The summer afterwards was also the first year he could drive, so we had to negotiate sharing of the car, sometimes acting as chauffeur for the other. I talked a lot with him and, for the first time, really listened. I realized we hadn’t sat down and trusted each other before.

When I was about to leave for college, I remember how he hugged me and said, “You know, I do love you and I will miss you.” That was the nicest thing he had ever said to me, and it shows how much we had grown up in the previous few years. Since starting school, I have kept in touch with him and with my family through the family group text, sporadic letters, video chats, and coffee outings over breaks. He and my mom visited campus last spring to see my choir concert, and it meant a lot that they came and supported me and saw my world; a handful of years ago, he wouldn’t have wanted to come.

Our relationship has changed completely since we were kids, no longer teaming up to play Mario Kart or fighting over the last cookie. We appreciate each other as unique individuals, and enjoy the other’s outlook on life. Most of all, we love each other, and recognize that that means that we still care about and respect one another when we don’t agree. We will continue to be friends in the future, no matter where we end up.