Things you'll Only Get If You're Shy

I've been shy for as long as I've been alive. Heck, I'm half convinced I came out of the womb blushing and too embarrassed to cry surrounded by strangers. My parents thought, or at least hoped, that I would grow out of it. I did not. I still hid behind my mother when she spoke to unfamiliar faces, even when I was far too old. I still sit in a corner at parties, watching and observing but never actually doing. I tend to only speak when spoken to. It takes me several meet ups before I am comfortable enough to fully be myself to someone. I don't think I've ever had a conversation with a member of the opposite sex that lasted more than three minutes. Maybe I can still grow out of it, I think most of my anxiety stems from extremely low self esteem, but until I can get my shit together, I'm shy and proud...kind of. Without further ado, this is for you my fellow introverts.

1. Dreading getting called on. In any setting. In any manner.

The 'Popcorn' reading game was your literal worst nightmare.

2. That awkward chuckle you give when you've already asked someone to repeat themselves once and don't want to do it again.

Then there's the awkward split second after where you hope and pray that a tiny laugh was applicable to whatever the heck they just said.

3. When you come across as really rude in any literally conversation that involves strangers.

I promise I'd respond if I wasn't internally panicking.

4. When people straight up ask you why you're so quiet.

IDK, Sharon, IDK.

5. The mere thought of confrontation makes you sick to your stomach.

On second thought, maybe I just let them keep my thousand dollar lawnmower.

6. Relationships seem out of the equation for you.

What do you mean you actually have to make conversation on dates?

7. People assume you're wise and a good listener and go to you for advice.

Just because I'm too scared to tell you to shut up does not mean I want to know about your new moles, Karen. I'm quiet, not a saint.

8. Despite it all though, being shy isn't all bad. Your friendships are solid.

Because they took so long to forge.

9. You rarely say stupid things.

Because you rehearse what you're going to say 1,000 times before you actually say it.

10. And you're awesome whether you talk a lot or not at all.

And don't let anyone tell you different.