You've heard it at school, in stores, online, and more. You've probably even said it at one point yourself. You've used it as a synonym for "stupid," "ridiculous," "foolish," and the list goes on. I'm talking about the word "retarded." People use this word negatively and throw it around without realizing the magnitude and strength of it, and the large community of people it hurts when it's said.
Whether you are saying it to describe someone with a disability or saying it to be funny – it is never funny and never the right word to use. The next time you feel you need to say this word because you think there simply is not a better word to use, here is a list of alternatives to the R-word that won't hurt and belittle a population of people.
Several people have said to me trying to end the R-word is a waste of time and that trying to "limit" the English language is preposterous. Trying to rid the world of a word that has been used for nothing but negative and hurtful connotations is not limiting the English language, it's like having the decency not to say racial slurs or hate speech (which the R-word is considered). Years ago, before doctors knew anything about people with disabilities, having a "retarded" child was unacceptable, and they were locked away in mental hospitals, sometimes their family never even saw them again. Having a "retarded" child was a death sentence, and these children were seen as burdens and embarrassments.
Today, we have extensive research on all kinds of different disabilities and have come very far with their acceptance and inclusion into society. However, this word is still used every day, with people making excuses for why it is OK to say – why is it ever OK to use a word a community of people have kindly asked you to stop using because of how devastating it is to hear?
When you say this word, you are not just hurting people with intellectual and developmental disabilities, but you are hurting the people who love them. You are contributing to the notion that people with disabilities are lesser people than able-bodied ones. You are taking away all of their accomplishments, and personality traits, and the things that people love about them and belittling and diminishing them down to one word – as if that is all they are, and the rest doesn't matter.
In 2010, President Obama signed a federal law known as Rosa's Law, which prohibits the terms “mental retardation" and "mentally retarded" from federal health, education, and labor policy and the terms "intellectual" and "developmental" disability are used instead. If the R-word isn't allowed to be used within the walls of a doctor's office and places of federal law, why is it OK for us to say it? Hint: It isn't.
The R-word reinforces negative stereotypes and serves no purpose other than to degrade and insult people with disabilities and make them feel like lesser valued members of humanity. Everyone has a gift and something to offer this world, and just like everyone else, people with disabilities want to be recognized for those things too, and not diminished because of a painful and untrue stereotype the R-word feeds into.
March 2 is International Spread the Word to End the Word day. Spread the Word to End the word is an international campaign that strives to remove the R-word from society. I challenge you to think about the severity of this word and the pain and sadness it causes people with disabilities and those who love them when it is used and encourage you to remove this word from your vocabulary. 586,711 people have currently taken the 2016 pledge to stop saying the R-word. I hope you will be one of those pledges, too.
