You’re at a party with your friends and you kind of only have one thing on your mind at the moment. IT. No, not Stephen Hawking’s IT, the “it” that involves way less clothing than you currently have on. I mean you didn’t come to this party to get laid but it’s been a while and you have to admit you may be one to many tequila shots in to be making sound decisions.
You find yourself looking over at that one friend who you have always secretly found attractive but never pursued because you’ve just never really thought of him in THAT way before.
But now that last tequila shot is making you second guess that decision and wow you never really noticed how sharp his jawline is and has he been working out because you swear he wasn’t this ripped before.
As you slowly make your way over to the place he’s casually watching the rest of your drunk friend’s sad attempt at beer pong you start to talk yourself into it. You two have always been flirty anyway and I mean what the heck you could just kiss him and it wouldn’t have to be a big deal. It doesn’t have to mean anything? Just one drunken hookup and your friendship will go right back to normal, right?
WRONG.
There are many appropriate ways a girl can get away with kissing her male friend without creating a negative impact on their relationship. The number one example being if you actually have feelings for the said male friend and you desire to pursue something greater than a friendship.
This, while changing the dynamic of the friendship, may not change it in a bad way. Another way a girl can go about kissing her male friend without side effects is being if the said kiss is simply platonic. For example, a friendly kiss at new years or a chaste pec in greeting.
Friends with benefits are where the lines begin to blur. A platonic relationship turned hookup can be messy, but with the proper communication skills, both parties can emerge from the new predicament a lot less horny and closer than they were before.
I mean, some may argue that you have to both be borderline sociopaths to make it work but that’s another story.
The reason a friends with benefits relationship can work is because often, both parties establish ahead of time the circumstances in which said hook up may occur and set any boundaries or limitations.
The problem with a drunken hook up is there often is no pre-determined conversation. No talk of “does this mean something” or “I’m just horny and think you’re hot”. It puts the two of you in limbo, and limbo is where friendships go to die.
So before you even take two drunk steps towards said hot friend think of the true consequences of the situation. In reality, a drunken hookup doesn’t mean the end of a friendship.
But it does make it a whole lot awkward. A whole lot of “you’ve seen me naked and I don’t think we can come back from that.”
Sure in the moment it's hot and fun but the morning after you remember how drunk you were and how sub-par your make out skills must have been while under the influence of tequila. So trust me.
Do yourself a favor and just don’t do it, or them.
