“Damn,” Jenna thought to herself, “I think I just ran over that guy. I hope he’s not dead. Oh well.” Jenna kept on driving down the deserted, windy road at breakneck pace. She had to get to the store before it closed. “I hope they have Mint Chocolate Chip,” Kate daydreamed as she flew past a stop sign and hit a cow shaped mailbox that mooed angrily as it crashed to the street.

“It’s just been one of those days,” Jenna thought to herself, “I need a fix and that Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream is exactly was the doctor ordered.” Jenna thought about all that had happened that day, most of it wasn’t out of the ordinary, at least not for Jenna.

So what if Jenna had broken a two thousand dollar vase? In the great scheme of things Jenna had broken far more expensive heirlooms during her time in the antique store. This one wasn’t even a rarity, why was her boss so angry about this vase?

Jenna closed her eyes for the briefest of moments before being jarred back into the real world upon hearing the frantic scattering of birds. “Oops,” Jenna thought to herself “Well, those ducks shouldn’t be walking on the road. It’s really their fault.”

Jenna’s cell phone started to ring and Jenna fumbled through her Louis Vuitton bag until she found what she was looking for. “Hi Brad,” Jenna cooed, “I was hoping you’d call baby. Oh it’s been a pretty ordinary day, you know broke something at the store, got bitched at. I’m going to the ice cream place now but I think I may have killed some idiot biking on the wrong side of the road. Oh and I destroyed some duck family’s home. No big though. What? No I don’t mind being on the phone while I drive. It calms me down actual- oh shit, what was that? Brad? Some car almost ran right into me but it was definitely their fault? Uh we were at a light. No I think my side was green but I’m not sure. Ok, I’ll call you when I get home, love you.”

Jenna threw her phone back into her bag and turned up the radio. She hummed and bopped along to Pat Benatar’s “Hit Me With Your Best Shot” and began picturing herself on stage in front of thousands of adoring fans. “Thank you, thank you,” Jenna exclaimed aloud to her invisible fans, “You really are too kind.”

Suddenly, Jenna noticed that the road she was on seemed to be inclining steeply. “Oops,” Jenna thought to herself, “I did it again.” Jenna sighed in resignation as her car fell backwards on the tow bridge and into the river below. “Thank God this water is only four feet deep,” Jenna thought while she waded through the water. Jenna had managed to save her beloved Louis Vuitton bag and pulled out her cellular lifeline and dialed her mother’s number.

“Mom,” Jenna tentatively whispered, “My Mercedes ended up in the river. I know but it wasn’t my fault there was a bridge malfunction. Nope, it looks completely wrecked I don’t think it’s going to be fixable. I know mom, I’m sorry. I don’t know how I let this happen again.”