Being Hell-Bent On Being A Self-Sufficient Woman Is Making Me Sick

In the mist of the rise of feminism, including pro-women and equality standpoints, women like myself are being taught that they do not need to lean on anyone, let alone men. This could be a great and empowering thing, until it forces us to shut ourselves in…

I work full time, go to school full time, own my own house, have a boyfriend, friends, and family. Add being painful self reliant to that list and it's a recipe for pure stress.

This society we are creating to empower women and make us feel as though we are completely self-sufficient may not be the best for anyone’s mental or emotional health. This push for all women to be closed off in their castles, too good, too strong to ever need to be saved isn’t realistic. All humans are flawed.

Not only are we keeping our thoughts and emotions to ourselves, we are pushing women to work and raise kids and take care of households and wear makeup and do all things womanly. As a 20-something-year-old working in corporate America, trying to keep my house together, and maintain a love life – enough is enough.

I’m addressing all my flaws, including the fact that I need to open up to my boyfriend – the love of my life.

My feminist qualities made me feel like I had to be tough as steel, just as men are. No emotions – no recaps of everything I’d done that day – no letting my guard down.

But I was so wrong. We all deserve to be loved and cherished. We deserve to be taken care of by our family and significant others and trust that we are not one hundred percent self-sufficient beings. No human is.

What I’ve learned is that it is okay to need to be saved – and it doesn’t make me less of a person. I’m not suggesting that we go back to a 1950s society in which women need approval from men or a knight in shining armor, but having a significant other and great friends and family in which we can completely allow ourselves to be vulnerable can lessen this overwhelming stress a lot of self-sufficient women feel.