In the past several weeks, I have seen more naked older men and women than I would have ever thought to see in my entire life. Yes, I am taking a life drawing class. Twice a week I sit in a full class for two hours and twenty minutes and we artists let our creativity flow as we attempt to perfect the human body on paper.

While it took me some time to draw figures that resembled a human, I can honestly say how proud I am of how far I’ve come. What I did not expect from this class was the sense of empowerment and self-love in one’s body.

When I say that my class has mostly drawn older, white, and usually overweight models, I mean that it has been rare for us to have drawn anything else. Yet, I discovered a newfound confidence in them that has radiated into the room every time they strike a pose. Some have wrinkles, some are hairy, some have scars, and some have body piercings or tattoos. They move and pose in such a way that almost seems unreal to capture onto paper.

Poses range from anywhere from 2 minutes to over 2 hours. The light beats on their faces as the expressions of relaxation are masked on them so well that you almost miss the beads of sweat forming at their temples and upper lip. It is certainly a job that takes courage, strength, and confidence, and I believe we can learn a thing or two from this experience.

Imagine yourself thirty years from now. How has your body changed? Is it heavier? Is it lighter? Are there any spots or marks that are new? Where are they? Has your hair changed? Are you hairier? Less hairy? Do you still have that tattoo? Or that body piercing?

There is no doubt that our bodies will go through significant changes thirty years from now, but what is it about our bodies today that make us so uncomfortable? I understand people want to look like Instagram models or like that famous actor from that one movie where they take their shirt off but unfortunately, that’s not reality. Those people can afford trainers and nutritionists, and they have the time to spend hours in the gym. I still have trouble balancing homework, school, and my job so working out five to six times a week is just impossible for me.

We live in a society where the idea to look a certain way is more important than expanding your mind. I see these models and the only thing I can think about is how at my age, which is significantly younger than theirs, I am afraid to display my body in a bikini. So how do I overcome this?

First, I think about how in this moment in time my body is youthful, meaning there aren’t any wrinkles, scars, age spots, or graying hair. Second, I think about how if these models are able to reveal their bodies so eloquently, then I should be able to do the same.

There is a special kind of self-love that emerges from within after being carefully watched and studied by art students. Think about standing naked in front of a mirror and what you might do if you were a model for an art class. What poses would you do? What facial expressions would you make? Think about the lines and shadows that would be drawn or the details of your skin. Think about the qualities that make you unique and how beauty is subjective.

While I may receive compliments for my artwork, it would not have existed if not for those models. Their confidence is what brings life into my art through their movements, their poise, and their ability to be watched for over two hours. I want to love myself as much as they do and I can truly say that life drawing has changed my perception of self-love in a positive and healthy way.