When You Love Yourself First, Everything Else Falls Into Place

When You Love Yourself First, Everything Else Falls Into Place

Self-Love Is The Best Love
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"You yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection” — Buddha

Self-love is a concept that I believe has grown in popularity over time, especially in this last year. It is probably one of the most challenging concepts to grasp as well because people are so critical of themselves that they forget that loving who they are is OK and it is much needed. I personally believe that in order to be loved by someone else, you have to first learn to love and accept yourself and all your flaws, hence the term "self-love."

Most people try to fill this void by searching for love and attention from others, which is the worst way to do it, but we have all been there. I know I have and it is so easy to get sucked back into that place, but you have to constantly remind yourself that you cannot search for love in other things or people. I recently saw a post by someone that read "Self-love, self-respect, and self-worth. There is a reason why they all start with self, you cannot find them in anyone else" and it really struck a nerve with me because of how accurate it is. We seek all of these things, but forget that we have to look at ourselves for the answers, not others.

Now, self-love looks different for every individual. For some people, it could mean going to the gym every day. For others, it could mean letting go of toxic people in your life. The end result is the same, however, which is doing things to make YOURSELF unbelievably happy and not anyone else.

You could even make the attempt to talk about yourself in a positive light and be more conscious of the way you speak about and to others. The way you love yourself should be no different than the love and attention you give to others in your life.

Once you start to develop self-love, the less you will turn to others for instant gratification. The only love and acceptance you truly need are from yourself because that's all that matters at the end of the day. Whether or not other people do shouldn't matter. As the lovely Buddha once said, you deserve your own love and affection just as much as anyone else, so don't ever feel guilty about doing so.

Of course, there are going to be some days where you may find it difficult to love yourself. We all have our fair share of ups and downs, but that's OK. You aren't perfect and no one is, but you can forgive yourself and simply focus on the little things. You have the ultimate power to do whatever you want with the one life you were given and can change it at any minute. So, remember to cut yourself some slack once in a while and embrace the person you are and the person you will be as you continue to grow every single day.

Cover Image Credit: Brooke Tominey

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22 New Things That I Want To Try Now That I'm 22

A bucket list for my 22nd year.

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"I don't know about you but I'm feelin' 22," I have waited 6 long years to sing that and actually be 22! Now 22 doesn't seem like a big deal to people because you can't do anything that you couldn't do before and you're still super young. But I'm determined to make my 22nd year a year filled with new adventures and new experiences. So here's to 22.

1. Go sky diving.

What's crazier than jumping out of a plane? (Although I'll probably try indoor skydiving first.)

2. Go cliff jumping/diving.

I must be the only Rhode Islander who hasn't gone to Jamestown and jumped off a cliff.

3. Ride in a hor air balloon.

Up, up and away.

4. Try out skiing.

Cash me in the next Olympics, how bout dat.

5. Try out snow boarding.

Shawn White, I'm coming for you.

6. Go bungee jumping.

Because at least this time I'll be attached to something.

7. Go to Portugal.

I mean I'm Portuguese so I have to go at some point, right?

8. Go to Cape Verde.

Once again, I'm Cape Verdean so I have to go.

9. Vist one of the seven wonders of the world.

I mean hey, Egypt's on, my bucket list.

10. Try out surfing.

It's only natural that somebody from the Ocean State knows how to surf.

11. Learn a new langauge.

Because my little bit of Portuguese, Spanish and Latin isn't cutting it anymore.

12. Travel to a state that I've never been to before.

Fun fact: I've only been to 17 of the 50 states.

13. Go paddle boarding.

Pretty boring but I've never done it.

14. Go scuba diving.

I'm from the Ocean State so I guess I should see the ocean up close and personal.

15. Learn how to line dance.

There's actually a barn in my state that does line dancing, so this one will definitely get crossed off.

16. Go kayaking.

All this water around me and I haven't done a lot of the water activites.

17. Stay the night in a haunted hotel room.

I bet if I got my friends to come with me, it would be like the Suite Life of Zach and Cody episode, minus the ghost coming out of the wall but you never know.

18. Get my palms read.

Because who doesn't want to know their future.

19. Go to a medium.

Like a medium that can communicate with people that have died.

20. Take a helicopter ride.

Air plane: check Helicopter:....

21. Sleep under the stars.

Because sleeping in a tent is more like glamping than camping

22. Just to try new things in my everyday life.

Whether it's trying a new restaurant, getting something different at my usual restaurants, changing my usual style, going on the scary rides at amusement parks, and bringing things I used to do back into my life now.

Cover Image Credit:

Author's illustration

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15 Ways Girls Can Practice Self-Love

For the longest time I was very unhappy with myself and had negative self love habits. Learning ways to feel good about myself and care for myself was life changing. Listen to your body and put your mental health first.

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Remember you are beautiful and always take care of yourself, ladies!!

1. Have some me time!

self love GIF by THE TRIXIE & KATYA SHOW

It is so important to take time for yourself. Relax and do what makes you happy.

2. Take a bath.

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Bubble bath with lavender and coconut oil is my go to!! its relaxing and makes your skin super soft

3. Masks, masks, masks...

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Hair masks and face masks are life changing. When you look good, you feel good. So take care of that pretty skin and lovely locks!!

4. Exercise.

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Try to be active at least three times a week. It is scientifically proven that exercise releases endorphins which is your "feel-good" hormone!!

5. Treat yourself (with your favorite food)!

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My go-to treat is Bluebell. There is nothing wrong with indulging every once in a while!

6. Treat yourself (materialistically)!

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Buy that cute top you've been eyeing. Buy that purse you told yourself you didn't reallllly need. Get yourself some flowers. Sunflowers are my personal favorite!

7. A good mani pedi.

on fleek GIF by Marie Claire

When I have a fresh set I feel like a whole new person. Try a new fun color or try getting dipped nails. It's the best thing ever.

8. Be kind to yourself.

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Absolutely no negative talk. Look in the mirror and tell yourself you're beautiful. Focus on the things you like about yourself.

9. Surround yourself with good people.

best friends love GIF by TV Land

Don't let people negatively effect you. You should be surrounded by people that love you and support your growth.

10. Chose. Yourself.


It's so easy to feel guilty for letting yourself be happy. But it's not a bad thing. You don't have to become selfish, but put yourself first sometimes.

11. Go out!

man i feel like a woman girls night GIF by Shania Twain

Get dressed up and go out with friends! Perhaps it is high-time to put on your best outfit and turn heads ;)

12. Take a vacation.

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Sometimes you just need some time away. It doesn't have to be somewhere far away. Just take a little break from adulting and relax a little.

13. Self-help books galore.

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I'm not much of a reader, but reading books about your current struggles really helps. Especially as a young woman, I really love "You're already Amazing" by Holly Gerth.

14. Pick up a new hobby!

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Start crafting, decorate your house, or bake cupcakes for all your neighbors! Find something that makes you happy and run with it.

15. Get your beauty sleep.

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My favorite activity is napping. Rest your mind and body. Beauty sleep is a thing. Rest and let that skin shine again!

Cover Image Credit:

Hannah Ward

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