Growth has been spectacular for me. However, it has been a process similar to Monopoly.
No sooner I feel myself moving forward, making progress and breaking habits, I am suddenly pulled back.
I have lost. I have gained. I have gone forward, celebrated my victories, and then went backward again. Sometimes closer to where I started.
I have felt darkness but found the light every time. Thinking back to these times serve as a friendly reminder that there is such a thing as a silver lining and another side behind the incline of struggles.
After every internal or external battle, there is some sort of "reward" equally as potent as the fight.
Even though this little game of life can be frustrating, I have realized that I can't just experience the good. I can't have good at all times. No life is ALL pure.
In order to experience the good, I also have to experience the not so pretty moments just so that I have that basis of comparison.
Since I have learned this, it has been slightly easier to triumph over the painful areas.
I'm aware that growth is born from the pain. The lost. The new territories. I am my worst enemy, yet I try to be my own support system.
I'll dip my toes into cold, cold water. Retreating back into my comfort zone, while knowing that I have to jump in soon.
It's kind of funny, really. The way our minds work for us and against us. Constantly shedding off our old skin. Always being reborn from our ashes, never forgetting where we started.
This bittersweet game of growth can grind us down to the bare minimum of who we are, but it can also help us rise into who we are meant to be, depending on how we react to the roll of the dice. We need to stay patient with ourselves.
