You're The Reason I Poured Vodka In My Baja Blast At 2 A.M. On A Tuesday

You're The Reason I Poured Vodka In My Baja Blast At 2 A.M. On A Tuesday

Don't let someone take advantage of you, just to make them feel okay.

1651
views

When I was 18, I fell in love with a boy.

We were on again and off again for over a year. While our relationship status varied over those 13 months we spent together, something never changed; the fact that I was in love with him.

There is a moment in time when you realize you are falling or have fallen in love with someone.

For me, these moments were two separate things.

The first was when we were driving home from a late night arcade date, one of our go tos. You had beat me at PAC-MAN. I made a joke that you owed me and you promised to make it up to me. On that drive, you rolled down the windows, blasted Katy Perry and sang along as loud as you could. I remember laughing like a little kid and smiling like an idiot. That's when it hit me: I was falling in love with you.

The second was when we were sitting in your room one night eating take out, just having a lazy night in. You had picked up your guitar and started playing a song I recognized. It was my all time favorite song, something I had told you over a month prior. At that moment I realized something else: I was in love with you.

These moments are something so sweet, and I would say anyone would be lucky to experience. With that said, there is more often than not a negative end to those; the moment you realize someone isn't the one. For some, that realization ends everything right then and there, but for me, it took weeks after to finally do something about it.

I felt trapped.

The boy I had fallen so deeply in love with managed to snap me out of love in a single message. While our relationship was nowhere near perfect, in fact, it was hardly a relationship at all by the end, he was still one of my best friends.

One night I got a text that said:

"You're the reason I pour vodka in my Baja Blast at 2 a.m. on a Tuesday."

Those words took the wind out of me. At that moment, I knew that even though I loved him with all my being that he was not the one for me.

In the end, I left this boy, but he will always hold a piece of me. He was the first person I had ever loved.

I'm okay with that, because he taught me so much. He taught me that I am worth more than I think, and not to let anyone change that.

While it may not always seem like it, you have the power to see yourself as worth more than a boy telling you-you're the reason he is being self-destructive; you will always be more.

Don't let someone take advantage of you, just to make them feel okay.

Popular Right Now

I Blame My Dad For My High Expectations

Dad, it's all your fault.
12061
views

I always tell my dad that no matter who I date, he's always my number one guy. Sometimes I say it as more of a routine thing. However, the meaning behind it is all too real. For as long as I can remember my dad has been my one true love, and it's going to be hard to find someone who can top him.

My dad loves me when I am difficult. He knows how to keep the perfect distance on the days when I'm in a mood, how to hold me on the days that are tough, and how to stand by me on the days that are good.

He listens to me rant for hours over people, my days at school, or the episode of 'Grey's Anatomy' I watched that night and never once loses interest.

He picks on me about my hair, outfit, shoes, and everything else after spending hours to get ready only to end by telling me, “You look good." And I know he means it.

He holds the door for me, carries my bags for me, and always buys my food. He goes out of his way to make me smile when he sees that I'm upset. He calls me randomly during the day to see how I'm doing and how my day is going and drops everything to answer the phone when I call.

When it comes to other people, my dad has a heart of gold. He will do anything for anyone, even his worst enemy. He will smile at strangers and compliment people he barely knows. He will strike up a conversation with anyone, even if it means going way out of his way, and he will always put himself last.

My dad also knows when to give tough love. He knows how to make me respect him without having to ask for it or enforce it. He knows how to make me want to be a better person just to make him proud. He has molded me into who I am today without ever pushing me too hard. He knew the exact times I needed to be reminded who I was.

Dad, you have my respect, trust, but most of all my heart. You have impacted my life most of all, and for that, I can never repay you. Without you, I wouldn't know what I to look for when I finally begin to search for who I want to spend the rest of my life with, but it might take some time to find someone who measures up to you.

To my future husband, I'm sorry. You have some huge shoes to fill, and most of all, I hope you can cook.

Cover Image Credit: Logan Photography

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

To The Boy I’ve Been Dating Since I Was 15, I Always Knew You Were My Forever

Thank you for showing me love when I thought I didn't deserve any.

393
views

Hey you,

People assumed our "fling" would only last a few short months. It's what everyone assumes when your first love happens during your sophomore year of high school. Yet here we stand, three and a half years later, more together than we've ever been. Although we've had our ups and downs, we still managed to keep our relationship going and to remember why we're together in the first place.

Many say loving isn't easy, but you make it a walk in the park.

You respect me in more ways than one, and you make me feel beautiful, inside and out. For a long time, I never noticed the beauty and strength I have within myself. I didn't see what others would point out to me, and at times I still find it hard to acknowledge my worth. However, you came into my life at a time when I felt I had no one, and you helped me to see all I have to offer. You helped me to open my mind to the thought of loving myself for who I am, and although the road is long and I'm not completely there, you've made me see how worthy of love I truly am.

Having you as my best friend, along with being my boyfriend, is the most rewarding feeling in the world.

I think the reason we rarely fight or stay angry with each other is that we truly are best friends. We could spend all of our time in deep conversation about any topic in the world and still feel engaged and ready to hear more from one another. Every single day I learn something new about you and vice versa. We can be ourselves in each other's presence and have fun doing absolutely nothing exciting. I am easily annoyed by a lot of things, but you are not one of them. Being with you for hours, even if we just watch TV the entire time, never gets repetitive or boring.

You treated me with the respect I deserved before I even realized I was worthy of it.

In many ways, I don't respect myself. Whether it be body image or letting "friends" walk all over me, I let many thoughts and people control my life. You, however, were the saving grace I needed. You've shown me how I deserve to be treated and how I should think of myself. Often I wonder how I got so lucky to end up with someone who loves me unconditionally and who values everything I have to offer. I say all the time that I don't deserve your heart, your kindness, your love, but you always remind me that I do. And I'm starting to realize that you're right; I deserve every bit of love, kindness, and respect that you have to offer. I can only hope that I award you with the same love and selflessness you give me every single day.

Three and a half years with someone may seem extremely long, but I feel as though we've been together a lifetime. It's hard to remember a time when you weren't right there beside me, and I would never want to imagine a future without you in it. There are so many more laughs, adventures, and memories to be made with you, and I only hope that I can be at least half of the person you are.

Thank you for pulling me out of the darkness. Today, tomorrow, and always.

Related Content

Facebook Comments