Loving yourself is not an easy job.
You'd think it'd come easily. After all, the daily instinctive acts of self-preservation keep us alive each day. Isn't that love? You follow the traffic rules, abide by the law of the land, keep away from poisonous food, scowl at cigarette smokers for spreading carcinogens....the list is endless. You keep yourself alive to see another day, to see yourself into the foreseeable future that you've planned for yourself. Your motivational/self love board on Pinterest has around 5000+ pins.
But is that love?
Think of a person you love. Go on, close your eyes and imagine a person - or a pet - whom you love greatly. Think about all their good attributes: their smile, their kindness, their compassion, even their corny jokes. Feel that smile on your face? Good, Now think of all the stuff that they do or they are that you don't like. All of it, even the times they made you miserable. The smile has probably receded a little.It's okay, you're allowed to feel negative emotions towards your loved ones (as long as it is temporary). However, now imagine them being upset. For any reason, whether self-inflicted or otherwise. Now think carefully...even if they are in pain because of their own actions, do you blame them?
Bear with me friends, you only need to keep eyes closed for a few more moments.
Now put yourself in the spot of your loved ones. Do you see all your good attributes? The perhaps-non-retarded smile (on good days), the maybe cute-yet-awkward personality, the somewhat decent hair. Notice how the tone changes. You're more cautious, more uncertain. You don't want to own up to the good things you've got going on for you. But now, count all your negative attributes. The voice inside your head suddenly gets stronger. Oh, that way you freaked out in public yesterday and embarrassed yourself. Ugh, your weight. And what about that skin? Why are you so lazy? Why aren't you achieving more yet? The list is endless. You feel that sharp jab of pain in your chest, followed by the mist of dejection slowly descending upon you? Now tell yourself, "It's not my fault!"
Do you believe it?
Despite how deceptively easy self care is made to seem these days, loving yourself is a real challenge. Affording yourself the same preferences you afford your loved ones is difficult. To truly accept yourself the way you are, to not be swayed by the world which tells you to constantly scrutinize your shortcomings yet undermine your achievements - that's love. And I know it's hard. It's hard to block the voices in your head and look at yourself objectively; to see yourself in an unbiased manner and to love yourself unconditionally.
But you gotta fake it 'til you make it, champ!
