I have learned very quickly that people usually measure success by two things. One, the amount of money you have or make. Two, where you're at in the "supposed to be" timeline.
The "supposed to be" timeline is a term that I use to refer to where people think you're supposed to be at in life according to where everyone else your age is at. For instance, so many of my friends are or have been in serious relationships. The ones that are currently in those relationships probably expect to get engaged upon graduating college. Why? Well, that's what everyone else is doing of course.
I used to believe that I wasn't successful in life because I wasn't making any money as a full-time college student and I have also never been in a relationship. The two "telltale" signs of true American success, or at least millennial success anyway.
I kept thinking that people underestimated me or respected me less or thought I was more immature because I had never been in love before. But, now that I sit down and write this I can see how ridiculous those words sound outside of my head. Your level of success or maturity in life is not measured by whether or not you have loved or lost. That's something I had to teach myself because society conditioned me to believe otherwise.
Something that took me a lot longer to learn was the importance of taking your life at its own pace. You're never going to be at the same place in your life as your best friend, coworker, sibling or cousin. Your life moves as quickly or as slowly as you want it to but believe me, there is no need to rush it.
I know that it's so much easier said than done, but society as a whole needs to stop being so judgmental. It's okay to be 40 years old and single, just like it's okay to be 25 and happily married with three kids. It's also okay to have kids and not be married or to be in love with a career instead of a person or to be in love with nothing at all.
Success shouldn't be measured by societies standards, success should be measured by how happy you are with your life. That is true success.
