Michael Myers, Jason Voorhees, Ghostface and more have terrified audiences for decades, but what exactly makes these cold-blooded killers scary? Is it their grotesque appearances? Their shiny, sharp weapons? The fact that they seem to be able to jump out of nowhere to strike fear both in their victims and those on the edge of their seats?
Perhaps. But I think that something that ties these villains and their numerous stories together is one simple thing: the possibility of such twisted and dark fantasies as “Halloween,” “Friday the 13th,” and “Scream” ever becoming a reality.
Are you kidding me?! A psychopath lurks in a neighborhood, stalking babysitters and butchering anyone that gets in their path. Yeah, right. Another psychopath hops around a rickety old campground chasing camp counselors and murdering them all in disgusting, disturbingly inventive ways. Uh-huh. Yet another psychopath makes anonymous phone calls to their victims, tormenting and terrifying them just before chasing them through the big house to kill them, all while wearing a generically bland mask that’s supposed to resemble a ghost. Totally. Please; it’s all too unrealistic to actually be believable!”
Gee, this sure sounds a lot like what that one guy says to his friends as they walk out of the theater minutes after seeing “Halloween” in 1978, obsessively checking over his shoulder every three seconds to ensure that the man in the chilling white mask isn’t following them. It sounds a lot like the girl that refuses to go to the bathroom alone after watching “Friday the 13th” at a slumber party. It also sounds exactly like what I said to my dad after we were done watching “Scream” when I was a mere 13 years old -- I think just before falling asleep that night, I made sure to thank both God and Jesus for caller I.D.
In our minds, we know that the very concept of a slasher movie is ridiculous. We don’t come home to find a man with a machete and a hockey mask waiting for us in the backyard. We don’t walk down the street and see a creep brandishing a kitchen knife and a pale white mask that kind of looks like that girl that put on 100 layers of makeup foundation. That one unsaved number ringing on the phone isn’t Roger Jackson waiting to ask you what your favorite scary movie is. Things like that just don’t happen in everyday life (except for rare circumstances, like those girls that tried to recreate the murders of the Scream movies… but that’s a different story for a different time! “Movies don’t create psychos; movies make psychos more inventive:” Billy Loomis [Skeet Ulrich], “Scream.”)
However, we can’t seem to shake that familiar fear that any one of those ridiculous scenarios could one day come true. Yes, movies like “Paranormal Activity,” “The Conjuring,” and “Annabelle” prey on our fear of the occult, the paranormal, and the unknown, but when it comes down to it, it's realistically more likely to come in contact with a masked murder than a ghost jumping out of the mirror or an ugly doll animated with the spirit of an evil demon. Murderers, however, (tragically and terrifyingly) do exist in our world, but we’re not positive that ghosts do too (yet).
And the mind definitely starts to wander to some pretty scary places after being exposed to such gory footage. Ending up pinned to a wall with an axe or hung from a tree after being mutilated with a knife are both ways no one ever wants to leave this life, and it is hilariously easy to psyche yourself out into thinking that Jason or Ghostface is coming for you to do the very same thing, right this instant as you lay in your bed trying to fall asleep, or even as you’re like, I don’t know, washing the dishes.
My point is that while these Hollywood Horrors are intentionally created to be larger than life, to provide two hours of thrills, jumps, and screams as a means of adrenaline-infused entertainment, they never fail to become much more than that in our minds. You know that, the filmmakers know that, the actors know that, and you cannot help but get caught up in the mythology and the terror of it all.
It’s why you check behind the shower curtain as you go pee, telling yourself “it’s just a movie” (like my parents did after watching “Scream” when it arrived in theaters Dec. 1996, so they tell me) just to give yourself some audible reassurance. It’s why you jump when the phone rings, disrupting the otherwise silent room you’re in. It’s why you scan the trees when you arrive at summer camp to look for anything out of the ordinary (guilty -- I do this every year the second I step foot on Mount Charleston for Leadership Camp, even after six years.)
“There's something really scary about a guy with a knife who just... snaps,” said Chloe (Kristen Bell) during the opening scene of “Scream 4.” Always remember, don’t hide under the bed, because that’s probably the first place the killer will look, and never say “I’ll be right back,” because you more than likely won’t be back. But most importantly of all, never forget that the best part of a scary movie is that you get to be frightened and thrilled without being in any actual danger. Happy watching!
