Boost Your Willpower: 25 Creative Methods to Decline Alcohol Gracefully!
Start writing a post
Lifestyle

25 Funny Ways To Say 'No' To Alcohol

Don't succumb to the pressure! Learn how to say no in a fun and different way!

8603
a sign about alcohol - a Dangerous and Unnecessary Medicine
Jeffrey Mayo

Sometimes we get stuck in sticky situations with friends that can leave us in an awkward position. Not everyone likes to drink and often in college you might find yourself being offered a drink. Don’t feel awkward, there’s no need to be weird about it! Here are 25 funny ways to say no to alcohol that get the message across without making anyone feel uncomfortable.

1. “I can’t. I’m underaged."

man in green crew neck shirt smiling Photo by Timothy Dykes on Unsplash

2. “I have an 8 a.m. tomorrow!”

3. “Drinking makes me bloated.”

4. “I’m gluten-free, sorry.“

5. “It’s the Lord’s Day!”

woman praying Photo by Ben White on Unsplash

6. “I respect the Justice System.”

7. “That drink probably isn’t helping your weight gain, Stacey!”

8. “I told my mom I wouldn’t take a drink from anyone who looks like they make less than six figures.”

9. “I don’t need alcohol to have fun and dance, I have the rhythm of life.”

10. “I’m already drunk, actually!”

woman in black tank top Photo by Alexander Grey on Unsplash

11. “No thank you, vodka is the drink of the godless Bolshevik.”

12. “Drinking gives me really weird BMs.”

13. “You’re not of age, I’m calling the police!”

14. “You’re not of age, and I AM the police!”

15. “I’m on the Whole 30”

selective focus photography of tape measure Photo by Siora Photography on Unsplash

16. “Just a beer? Where I’m from we make REAL drinks with lighter fluid, Gatorade, and a little bit of Rosé!”

17. “I’m already popular, I don’t need to drink.”

18. “OK, but the last time I drank I killed a guy.”

19. “I don’t have secrets I’m hiding from so I can stay sober.”

20. “Someone needs to drive and your car smells bad so it’s gotta be me!”

woman in gray hoodie sitting inside car during daytime Photo by Jenny Ueberberg on Unsplash

21. “I have to meet with my probation officer tomorrow morning and I probably shouldn’t be hungover.”

22. “I value my brain cells.”

23. “Would you offer your mother a Fuzzy Nave?!”

24. “You mean to tell me you ruined a perfectly good jar of cherries by soaking them in alcohol?!”

25. “I’m a Mormon."

man in pink dress shirt sitting on brown wooden bench reading book Photo by Manny Becerra on Unsplash

There you have it folks, 25 surefire ways to turn down the Devil's nectar and keep things cool. The last thing you'd wanna do is look like a square, right? Remember, it's cool to be yourself. Never consume something you don't want to for someone else's sake.

Report this Content
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

94358
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments