Save The Dying Art Of Conversations

Save The Dying Art Of Conversations

There is nothing more valuable and genuine than the ability to have a deep relationship with others.

From texting to emailing to snapping and everything in between it has become clearly evident that the art of real conversation is becoming extinct. From millennials to baby boomers, the act of sitting down for long periods of time to just talk with someone on a deeper level has become a foreign and unthinkable concept. This is a result of a faster moving society, the uprising of the digital and social media frontier, and, as a result, the lack of emotional connection with one another. How often do you see people sitting down for long periods of time having engaging conversations in regular communal places? Not often I bet. The norm of deeper conversations has become brisk talks about how our government is lacking, why liberal ideologies are the future, and how tragically our world is blowing up into war and terror. These are all good topics don't get me wrong, but they require more thought and conversation than just 140 characters on twitter from bandwagon jumping people. Those actions won't spur the change that everyone is seeking, but real conversations will.

We have somehow gotten it into our heads that we always need to keep moving faster and/or always need to be doing something, as if it is going to fill the voids in our lives magically. I'm not saying that all of our progression is pointless, because it's not, but there are some times in our lives where we need to just take a step back from the daily grind and talk with people. Going deeper into conversations about art, politics, religion, self-care, etc.There can only be so much progression without conversation. Though it seems like taking an hour or two out of your day is pointless and unproductive I promise you that it is not. You can learn so much about the person you're talking with, about the world around you, and develop your current ideologies. There is nothing more valuable than having knowledge and an open mind.

Everything in life is a small part of a larger train reaction,and the constant need to keep moving has pushed us into a digital mindset that prevents the want to have a face to face or even just a verbal conversation with others. The act of taking out our phones and texting someone when we need to talk to them has become a tragic reflex, and I am no more guilty of this then the next. Calling someone and physically talking with them seems like too much of a task that requires energy we feel like we don't already have. Which in turn is a lame excuse we tell ourselves. Social media sights are another breeding ground for nonverbal communication. Tweeting or sub tweeting at someone to either complain or comply has become a common way of communicating to someone your thoughts, but in actuality it is just petty and/or in-genuine. Ironically, if you look close enough you will notice that the people who use social media the most are the ones who crave deeper connections with others. No real deep connections can be formed through social media replies alone. It can be a starting point, but at some point verbal and face to face interactions need to occur for a real emotional connection to occur.

I said it before and I'll say it again, real change and real connections are formed through verbal and physical conversations. There is an unspoken act of genuine care that shows through when you take the time to truly show you care by talking and communicating with others around you.

This article was written with the intention of being a wake up call, and not one of condemnation and hypocrisy because this is an issue we all suffer from to a certain degree. If you want to be the change or cultivate deeper relationships start by asking a friend, family member or anyone else you see fit to coffee or dinner or whatever else suits you, and see where it goes from there. Sometimes this strategy isn't for everyone, so I encourage you to find ways that are comfortable for you to engage in more physical communications. After you establish the "meeting" evaluate the content. Go deeper than asking about the weather or what's up with them. Ask questions that will enable you to have deeper conversations.

About a year ago, I spoke with a dear friend about this very topic and she brought up the concept of writing down questions you have asked or have been asked of you. This list can then be used as a tool for future conversations. Below are just a few questions I have on my list I received from my friend.

"How do you feel close to people?"

"What's your personality?"

"What's one of your favorite sensory experiences?"

"What are a few topics that are essential for the closest people to you to know about/be caught up to date with you on, in order for you to feel fully known?"

"Is "home" a place(s) and/or a persons(s)? Why?

Initially reading or answering these kinds of questions can feel uncomfortable or unanswerable. Either because it makes you too vulnerable or it is something you've never really considered, but that just goes to show how socially inept our society has become. We have found it awkward and uncomfortable to share who we really are. Questions like these don't need to be dived into immediately, but it should be something to work towards. Deeper bonds will last forever and help our society's ability to grow stronger.

Take a breath and be the change to save the dying art of conversation.

Cover Image Credit: Stocksnap

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When You Give A Girl A Dad

You give her everything

They say that any male can be a father, but it takes a special person to be a dad. That dads are just the people that created the child, so to speak, but rather, dads raise their children to be the best they can be. Further, when you give a little girl a dad, you give her much more than a father; you give her the world in one man.

When you give a girl a dad, you give her a rock.

Life is tough, and life is constantly changing directions and route. In a world that's never not moving, a girl needs something stable. She needs something that won't let her be alone; someone that's going to be there when life is going great, and someone who is going to be there for her when life is everything but ideal. Dads don't give up on this daughters, they never will.

When you give a girl a dad, you give her a role model.

If we never had someone to look up to, we would never have someone to strive to be. When you give a little girl someone to look up to, you give her someone to be. We copy their mannerisms, we copy their habits, and we copy their work ethic. Little girls need someone to show them the world, so that they can create their own.

When you give a girl a dad, you give her the first boy she will ever love.

And I'm not really sure someone will ever be better than him either. He's the first guy to take your heart, and every person you love after him is just a comparison to his endless, unmatchable love. He shows you your worth, and he shows you what your should be treated like: a princess.

When you give a girl a dad, you give her someone to make proud.

After every softball game, soccer tournament, cheerleading competition, etc., you can find every little girl looking up to their dads for their approval. Later in life, they look to their dad with their grades, internships, and little accomplishments. Dads are the reason we try so hard to be the best we can be. Dads raised us to be the very best at whatever we chose to do, and they were there to support you through everything. They are the hardest critics, but they are always your biggest fans.

When you give a girl a dad, you give her a credit card.

It's completely true. Dads are the reason we have the things we have, thank the Lord. He's the best to shop with too, since he usually remains outside the store the entire time till he is summoned in to forge the bill. All seriousness, they always give their little girls more than they give themselves, and that's something we love so much about you.

When you give a girl a dad, you give her a shoulder to cry on.

When you fell down and cut yourself, your mom looked at you and told you to suck it up. But your dad, on the other hand, got down on the ground with you, and he let you cry. Then later on, when you made a mistake, or broke up with a boy, or just got sad, he was there to dry your tears and tell you everything was going to be okay, especially when you thought the world was crashing down. He will always be there to tell you everything is going to be okay, even when they don't know if everything is going to be okay. That's his job.

When you give a girl a dad, you give her a lifelong best friend.

My dad was my first best friend, and he will be my last. He's stood by me when times got tough, he carried me when I just couldn't do it anymore, and he yelled at me when I deserved it; but the one thing he has never done was give up on me. He will always be the first person I tell good news to, and the last person I ever want to disappoint. He's everything I could ever want in a best friend and more.

Dads are something out of a fairytale. They are your prince charming, your knight in shinny amour, and your fairy godfather. Dads are the reasons we are the people we are today; something that a million "thank you"' will never be enough for.

Cover Image Credit: tristen duhon

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12 Ways To Save Money During The Summer When All You Want Is To Spend It

Saving is important year round, but it's most important in the summer


Over the summer, everyone normally has more free time than during the year, and that means more time to spend more money. Saving money over the summer is important, not only so you can be prepared to pay for things in the future, but also so you can enjoy your summer and no be stressed about how much money you've spent. Saving money is something that should happen year round, but it's especially important to do in the summer.

1. Create a budget

Starting the summer off on the right foot is super important to stay on track throughout the rest of the summer. A budget is something that you should have year round, but it's important to adjust it for your summer plans.

2. And stick to it

Not only do you have to make a budget, but you have to stick to it. If you don't follow your budget, you're wasting time and money, and it's hard to keep on top of finances.

3. Take advantage of student discounts

During the summer, college students find themselves with a lot more free time than in the school year. When you're planning what to do with your extra time, make sure to look if the place offers student discounts or not. Why pay full price when you don't have to?

4. Don't always go out to eat

College students tend to spend time with their friends going out for food or for drinks, and that adds up fast. If you have friends over to cook dinner, it can be healthier and cheaper to do.

5. Sublet

If you have an apartment you're not going to be staying in, or need to stay in Columbus, it's beneficial both ways to sublet. Neither way do you have to pay full price on an apartment, and any discount, no matter how small, saves you money

6. Take day trips

Obviously, no one wants to stay in one place the whole summer, but travel is super expensive. By going on day trips you get to see more of the state or city, but you don't have to pay for lodging overnight. It's a good way to get out without eating into your budget.

7. Walk around

Columbus has great parks and trails that not enough people think about using when they're planning what they want to do. If you walk around outside, you can spend as much time you want there and you don't have to pay anything.

8. Split costs with friend

Do both of you need a Hulu and a Netflix account? Why not share the costs and the passwords with each other, so that you both can save some extra cash in the future. This doesn't just have to be with streaming services, but it can apply to food and parking costs as well.

9. Don't impulsively buy big items

Maybe you've worked a ton recently to start saving for summer, or you have graduation money flowing in. You feel like it doesn't matter how much you spend, but it does. If you hold off on those purchases, and you save your money, you'll be in a better spot financially at the end of the summer.

10. Get a job

The obvious one. If you're doing an unpaid internship or your normal job isn't offering you many hours, then getting a second job where you can work to have a little more money can help you achieve your savings goal.

11. Don't be too hard on yourself

The hardest part of setting goals is when you don't achieve them. Even if you haven't saved exactly as much as you wanted, making even a small change can help your financial wellbeing and can be enough to make small changes in the future.

12. Don't force yourself to make big changes

Everyone's saving tips to Millennials are to stop getting coffee every single day from places like Starbucks. While cutting down on spending in these ways will greatly help you save money, it's not the only thing that will help. There's no reason to make yourself miserable in order to follow the rules of someone else for a small change financially.

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