Thoughts Retail Managers Have

24 Thoughts Every Retail Manager Has During Their Shift

Another day, another pissed off customer.

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I love my job. Despite all its ups and downs, I love what I do and I do what I love. The people I work with make it all that much better.

That being said, I can't say there haven't been times I've wanted to rip my hair off and run for the hills. Some days are better than others, but I'm sure I'm not the only one.

Here are 24 thoughts every retail manager has during their long, 8-hour shift:

1. *Clocks in* "Anotha day, anotha dolla!"

2. *10 minutes later* "What time is it? Am I off now?"

3. "How close are we to our sales plan today?"

4. "No, we don't have that in that size."

5. "And no, we don't have anymore sizes in the back."

6. "I don't know why we have the same shirt for full price and in clearance. I don't make the prices, I just sell the dang clothes."

7. "What the f*ck is this?"

8. "No, seriously. What is this? Did someone just sh*t in our fitting room?"

9. "No, ma'am. That is not on sale."

10. "No. That is not on sale either."

11. "WHERE DOES IT SAY IT'S 50% OFF?!"

12. "That sign's for SWEATERS not DRESSES."

13. "I'm hungry. What am I going to eat on my break?"

14. "Ooo, this is cute. I wonder how much it'd be with my discount."

15. "OK, so it's 4:15 PM. That means there's only 35 minutes left till my break."

16. "OK, I'm back. Time to think of a game plan so I can have a good close tonight."

17. "SHOPLIFTER IN ROOM 1!"

18. "OK, they're gone. I scared them off."

19. "I WANNA GO HOME!"

20. "Time to turn off the music aka GO HOME!"

21. "2 minutes till close..."

22. "1 minute till close..."

23. "YES! 9 on the dot!"

24. "OK, I'm just going to quickly close all the registers, finish up the closing procedures, and we can gtfo."

24. "Done! I'M FREEEE... Until tomorrow."

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75 Of The Most Iconic Vine Quotes

"I smell like beef"

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Vine may be dead but Vine references live on. I still watch Vine threads AT LEAST twice a day. Here are 75 of the most quotable vines:

1. "Ooooooo, he needs some milk."

2. "Hi, welcome to Chili's."

3. "It is Wednesday, my dudes."

4. "Country boy, I love you ahhhwweelhwh..."

5. "Escalera oooooooaaaa!"

6. "F**k ya chicken strips!"

7. "Barbecue sauce on my titties."

8. "Gimme your F**KING money!"

9. "That was legitness."

10. "Ms. Keisha, MS. KEISHA! Oh my f**king God, she f**king dead."

11. "Fre-sha-vocado."

12. "Staaaahp! I coulda dropped my croissant!"

13. "That's my OPINION."

14. "You're not my dad, ugly ass f**king noodle head."

15. "What the f**k, Richard."

16. "This bitch empty, YEET!"

17. "Road work ahead? Yeah, I sure hope it does."

18. "What up, I'm Jared I'm 19, and I never f**king learned how to read."

19. "Um, I'm never been to oovoo javer."

20. "My God, they were roommates."

21. "Why are you running, why are you running?"

22. "Whoever threw that paper, your mom's a hoe."

23. "I can't swim."

24. "Lebron James."

25. "It's an avocado, thanksssss..."

26. "Mother trucker dude, that hurt like a butt cheek on a stick."

27. "Watch your profanity."

28. "I love you bitch, I ain't never gonna stop loving you, biiiiiitch."

29. "What are thoooooose?"

30. "I smell like beef."

31. "You better stop."

32. "What the F**K IS UP KYLE?"

33. "Come get y'all juice."

34. "Two bros, chilling in a hot tub, 5 feet apart cause they're not gay."

35. "So you just gonna bring me a birthday gift on my birthday to my birthday party on my birthday with a birthday gift?"

36. "I wanna be a cowboy, baby."

37. "Why you always lying?"

38. "Nice Ron" "I sneezed, oh, what, am I not allowed to sneeze?"

39. "I'm washing me and my clothes."

40. "Honey, you've got a big storm coming."

41. "XOXO, gossip girl."

42. "Shoutout to all the pear."

43. "A potato flew around my room before you came."

44. "Chipotle is my life."

45. "Look at all those chickens!"

46. "YOU BETTER STOP."

47. "I like turtles."

48. "It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen in my life, watermelon, INSIDE A WATERMELON."

49. "Deez nuts, HA GOT EM?"

50. "F**k you, I don't want no ravioli."

51. "21."

52. "I'm in my mum's car, broom broom."

53. "Iridocyclitis."

54. "You know what, I'm about to say it."

55. "That is NOT correct."

56. "Uh, I'm not finished" "Oh my God, can you let me do what I need to do?"

57. "I have osteoporosis."

58. "ADAM."

59. "Merry Chrysler."

60. "Wait a minute, who ARE you?"

61. "Try me, bitch."

62. "When will you learn, THAT YOUR ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES?"

63. "I didn't get no sleep cause of y'all, y'all not gone get no sleep cause of me!"

64. "Do you want to go see Uncle Cracker or no?"

65. "So no head?"

66. "You got eczema."

67. "I am shooketh."

68. "Hey my name is Trey, I have a basketball game tomorrow."

69. "Can I PLEASE get a waffle?"

70. "There is only one thing worse than a rapist." "A child."

71. "Ah f**k, I can't believe you've done this."

72. "Bitch, I hope the f**k you do."

73. "Two shots of vodka."

74. "F**k off Janet, I'm not going to your f**king baby shower."

75. "JEEEEEZ, Jesus Christ."

Cover Image Credit:

Vine/Katie Ryan

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12 Ross Geller Memes That Describe College Finals

Finals are hard enough as it is.

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These memes of Ross from Friends describe finals week perfectly.

1. Scheduling Finals

2. When Finals Week Begins

3. When Everyone Is Telling You To Study

4. When The Stress Sets In

5. The Night Before The Exam

6. When You Turn The Exam In

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8. On The Exam Day

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