First and foremost, I am so sorry for the unfortunate events that you have had to experience these last couple of weeks. As you mentioned in your article, your mother has recently fell ill again and your wife has admitted she has been committing adultery against you. These are not easy things to deal with, and I truly send my prayers towards everyone that is effected in those two situations. Although I cannot relate to the cheating, I have experienced a similar devastating diagnosis when I found out I had Prolactinoma (which is basically a benign brain tumor). So please accept my condolences, as I too have felt the extreme weight of similar news.

When I read your article my heart broke. I know what it feels like to have no control in your circumstances, and you’re right, it feels pointless. In fact, this morning as I was experiencing a minor panic attack because I felt helpless against God’s will. I found myself bawling my eyes out as I sat on my ceramic shower floor. One could say that I had reached a new low. However, the only thing that got me through that hour was crying out to God with a broken spirit, asking Him to consul me.

Wait! Before you click out of this article, let me respond to a few of your concerns. First, bad things will always take place in your life, especially if you love God. Take His disciples for example, they were constantly being faced with vicious storms (both literal and figurative), just for the fact that they loved Jesus (Mark 4:35-41, Matthew 14:22-33). Again, think about Paul who was actually blinded by the Lord. Even when Paul decided to dedicate his life to Jesus, many believe that thorn in his side is evidence that Paul suffered from vision problems for rest of his life.

Now, how could a God that is supposed to be good inflict those He cares about to experience pain? Well, to answer a loaded question like that, you have to start with Genesis. There, we find that the world was initially created without pain and suffering.

So, hold up Hanna, but why is there pain and suffering now? Cause Eve ate an apple? If God knew that she would eat the apple why did God allow her to sin?

Well, what if I told you that you absolutely had to stay with your wife after she cheated on you? That nothing you could say or do would allow you to divorce her. You might say that’s unfair because love is only love if one can choose to stay or leave. Which is exactly the reason why God allowed Adam and Eve to eat the apple, because forcing them to live in His perfect and loving world would be controlling, not loving.

After Adam and Eve ate of the tree and decided to walk away from the perfect guidance of God, all humanity was effected.

Hanna, that’s so harsh! I would never selfishly choose to live without God! Why should I be punished?

Well, you are the descendant of Adam and therefore, you bare his same consequences. If you think about it, the most gracious thing God could have done was send His son to erase every mistake you’ve ever made so that Adam’s sin no longer had to weigh on you.

So, back to the question at hand, “Is God good?”

To this I would argue, yes, He is. He so good that you don’t have to experience pain alone, rather you can cry out to Him, like I did this morning, and He will come to your side. Even through sickness or malicious attack by others, don’t force yourself to live inside a self-suffering state. Rather, let God take your burdens so that you can walk weightlessly knowing that He is ready to be through whatever you experience in life.